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The Elf on the Shelf is a horrific Christmas tradition.

Designed to scare children into good behavior, the Elf is a cheery-eyed Santa crony. He monitors children for the big man, reports back, and ultimately decides whether you end up on the naughty list or not.

Or so we’re told.

via GIPHY

Since 2004, the Elf on the Shelf has terrorized children with its watchful gaze and frozen smile. Well, it’s time to pay the piper.

The father-son team over at What’s Inside took a razor to the Elf recently to reveal the plastic, cottony innards and shut down this ruse once in for all.

via Imgur

So what was inside? Did the spirits of a thousand convicted murderers flutter out of the Elf’s stomach?

Well, not exactly. It’s mostly just filled with catharsis, plastic beads, and cotton. Still, pretty great to watch this little creep get torn to shreds.

via Mashable

Ok. Deep Breaths. Kellogg’s just announces that they would be making Dunkin’ Donuts coffee-flavored Pop-Tarts, according to Mashable. The breakfast giants are teaming up to release two new favors, Frosted Chocolate Mocha and Frosted Vanilla Latte, for a limited time.

via Reaction Gifs

Ok. Get a grip. It’s just breakfast. It’s not like you finally have a reason to make that kid with the Toaster Strudels jealous.

These new, heavenly sounding Pop-Tarts will be released this month. We’ll keep an eye out if anyone gets three in a pack.

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trevor noah owns tomi lahren on the daily show colin Kaepernick doland trump
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Tomi Lahren, the hyper-conservative host of Tomi on The Blaze, who you might recognize from the Facebook posts of that dude you went to high school with, visited Trevor Noah on The Daily Show last night, and it went pretty much as expected. Lahren, in her typical hot-headed way, clinged tightly to her platform as she wrestled with a relaxed Trevor Noah over such issues as Black Lives Matter, Colin Kaepernick, immigration, and, of course, that billionaire reality-TV game show host that won the presidency last month.

These segments are basically set up to be viral eviscerations, and this one is no different. Tomi generally feels like she’s on the defense, especially when she says things like “I don’t see color” and “Donald Trump is reasonable.” Final thoughts: This is an awkward half hour that will likely dominate your social media feeds for the next 24 hours.

So prepare to tug your collar because here’s Tomi Lahren on The Daily Show looking for a leg to stand on.

via GIPHY

philip morris phasing out cigarettes for new tobacco device
Via: Giphy
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Nothing will stop 2016 until pigs fly.

According to Andre Calatzopoulos, chief executive of cigarette and tobacco behemoth Philip Morris, “he would like to work towards the ‘phase-out’ of conventional cigarettes.”

What? Philip Morris not making cigarettes is something akin to a dairy farmer making soy milk or a slaughterhouse making seitan or a poison maker making an antidote. What’s going on here?

via GIPHY

The BBC reports:

In his first UK broadcast interview, he has told the Today programme that the company knows its products harm their consumers, and that the only correct response is to "to find and commercialise" ones that are less harmful.
"That is clearly our objective," he said.

The company has announced a new “healthier” cigarette, which boasts 90% less of the 'nasty toxins that come from cigarette smoke.' 

The innovation in this new system, called lqos, doesn’t burn cigarettes, it heats them.

via BBC

It works like this. You buy a pack of “tobacco sticks” and pop them in a heater. You put the stick to your mouth and puff. This causes much less smoke and smell.

But of course, let’s not forget smoking is still incredibly dangerous. Anti-smoking groups aren’t taking their eyes off the prize.

“On current trends, smoking will kill one billion people in the 21st century, most in poor countries,” Deborah Arnott, said, chief executive of Action on Smoking and Health. "If Philip Morris really want to see the end of smoking they have to stop promoting smoking to new young smokers around the world."

Pigs, you have 31 days to start flying.

8bitdo releases wireless nintendo nes classic controller
Via: Mashable
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How many times have you been on the last level of Super Mario Bros. 3, and you get so excited that you jump up and rip the controller out of the system?

10? 20? 100 times?

Your days of leaving Princess Peach to die at the hands of Bowser are over thanks to this wireless Nintendo NES from 8Bitdo. The Retro Receiver set turns your brand-new NES Classic into the system of your wireless dreams, allowing you the full range of excitement that comes with beating Super Mario Bros. 3.

via Reddit

The set comes with an NES30 controller, a USB charging cable, and bluetooth reciever. Only one per box, though. Also, as Mashable was quick to point out, you can use the receiver for almost any “current-gen wireless controller other than Xbox,” meaning you can use PS4 or Wii controller on this bad boy.

The controller ships on December 16 and costs $39.99 on Amazon.

canadian police punish drunk drivers with nickleback
Via: WIUX
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Drinking and driving is a dangerous practice that still far too many people do. It’s not surprising. People go out, have a few too many, and either think they’re “cool to drive” or just don’t care. It’s a very serious problem.

And a serious problem needs a serious solution.

In an effort to deter drunk driving, police in Kensington, Prince Edward Island, Canada will be picking the music on the way to jail, and you’re not going to like it.

According to a Facebook post by the Kensington Police Sevice, “When we catch you, and we will catch you, on top of a hefty fine, a criminal charge and a years driving suspension we will also provide you with a bonus gift of playing the offices copy of Nickelback in the cruiser on the way to jail.”

via Imgur

This is how they remind you not to drink and drive, apparently.

“Now, now, no need to thank us, we figure if you are foolish enough to get behind the wheel after drinking then a little Chad Kroeger and the boys is the perfect gift for you.

“So please, lets not ruin a perfectly good unopened copy of Nickelback. You don't drink and drive and we won't make you listen to it.”

*Shivers*

Look, no one wants that. This holiday season, avoid Nickleback by getting a designated driver.

Can you hear that? It’s the sound of “Hello, darkness, my old friend.” Or is that the Curb Your Enthusiasm theme.

Whatever it is, it’s the sound of someone giving into a man that they called a “phony” and “fraud.” At least, that’s the look on Mitt Romney’s face as he eats dinner with Donald Trump as he once again interviews for a job in the Trump administration. He looks scared, broken, and maybe, in danger — harkening back to that time just a few months ago when it looked like New Jersey Governor Chris Christie was being held hostage by our president-elect.

via Vine

But don’t take my word for it, Twitter has already had a go at captioning the saddest night of Mitt Romney’s life — and this guy lost a presidential election.

Check out some of the best reactions to the moment when a million voices inside Mitt Romney cried out in terror and were suddenly silenced.

donald trump,photoshop,Memes,dinner,politics
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