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trending news celebrity dj khaled personal philosophy book release november
Via: RapDose
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DJ Khaled is an author now.

His book, "The Keys" hits stores this November 22nd, and will be found near the "Success, Motivation & Self-Esteem" section on your local bookstore's shelves.

The hip-hop producer promises to provide such tips for success as "don't drive your jet ski in the dark."




His publisher is promising that the book will answer your pressing questions, like "[breaking] down the philosophy behind his trending catchphrases, including 'another one,' 'secure the bag,' 'special cloth alert,' 'bless up' and more."

The book description sounds more like Khaled is fleeing from an oppressive Scientology group than writing from a producer's perspective (who are the THEY he is afraid of?):



Buy a signed copy at a bargain price (shocker) here.




trending satire news american girl betchiness ranking lol
Via: Betches
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American Girls. Those super-expensive dolls you could buy to look creepily exactly like you, look nothing like you, or to just be cute:


She's definitely cute


We can agree--whether with our parents over how much they cost, or at our friends for not letting us rip off their heads or cut off their hair--we have all had anger toward them at some point in our lives.

Enter Betches and their definitive ranking of the American Girls by Betchiness.

We get the glory of seeing that entitled historical b*tch Samantha, finally getting put in her place.

...and seeing Josefina Montoya--pronounced "HO-SEF-INA" (I know, because I used to work there and was REQUIRED to correct people who called in to order one, fun times)--put in her damn place brings me NO END of pleasure:




Plus with randos like Caroline Abbott...


...you will feel the satisfying burn of familiar hatred sparked within the childlike center of your soul.


Don't you just hate our faces?!


Check out more of the awesomeness and pick your favorite betch here.


trending news sexual funny american town names
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The good folks over at Estately Blog have an excellent sense of humor.

They "placed our minds in the gutter and spent days looking over detailed maps and scrutinizing the names of all cities, towns, and unincorporated communities for anything that sounded even remotely sexual or perverse."



Have a laugh and enjoy their intended "The Master List of the Most Obscene Town Names in America," as you make your next vacation plans.



Also check out their list of Oddest Town Names in each State as you ponder over the sexual issues of the people of Tennessee...




Via: British GQ
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Oh Amy, how we love you so. Check out 4:15 in the video, where Amy Schumer reveals her sexual history with Patrick Stewart, as she accepted her Man of the Year Award for Best Woman at the British GQ awards ceremony.


You'll always be my Man of the Year, Amy.


trending news funny pool toy cockroach float
Via: Amazon.com
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Summer's almost over, but the fun can keep going all Autumn long with this Giant Cockroach Raft!



Just think--Dad puts the cover on the pool, you sneak out and hide this baby underneath it, next summer when he goes to open the pool BAM! HEART ATTACK!!

There's also this beauty that I'd love to ride:



I'm gonna ride this heat wave as long as possible, goddammit...




trending twitter hashtag namebrandmoviequotes funny
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Twitter is erupting with the hilarious hashtag of #NameBrandMovieQuotes. Check out some highlights here:





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