great dick bro,hayley wade,Photo,student elections,University of Calgary
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University of Calgary student Hayley Wade (campaign slogan: "Great dick, bro!") has been elected Vice President of Student Life after placing her posters above men's room urinals to appeal to a certain segment of the student body.

"I have no hope for the future 'professionals' the University of Calgary is supposed to be pumping out," said one of her fellow U of C students.

You say that now, but Hayley could be Prime Minister one day. Canada can't have that many urinals, right?

[copyranter.]

marilyn hagerty,Not The Onion,olive garden,olive garden review,Photo
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Marilyn Hagerty has been writing the Eatbeat column for North Dakota's Grand Forks Herald for "30 or 40 years," and the 86-year-old journalist is now receiving national attention for her review of the most hotly-anticipated new restaurant to hit Grand Forks in years: The Olive Garden.

In today's column, Hagerty called the chain "the largest and most beautiful restaurant now operating in Grand Forks," praising the Tuscan decor as "impressive" and the alfredo as "comforting on a cold day."

Hagerty's review brought in hundreds of times the traffic of a usual Thursday column, prompting the paper to post a follow-up story about her newfound viral fame.

They explained to readers that "residents of more metropolitan areas found it amusing that a chain restaurant would be reviewed. In larger markets, newspaper reviews are reserved for exclusive, high-end eateries that offer fine dining."

Hagerty said her daughter wanted her to read all the Facebook comments about her review, but "I told her I'm working on my Sunday column and I'm going to play bridge this afternoon, so I don't have time to read all this crap."

The joke may be on the people making fun of Hagerty, though. According to a former editor at the Herald, her seemingly glowing assessment of the Olive Garden was anything but.

"By the way, her regular readers will recognize that as a fairly negative review since she spent a lot more time on the ambience than the food," he said.

[eater / grandforksherald / villagevoice]

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PBS arts series Off Book takes a look at the animated GIF's journey from annoying GeoCities site decoration to beloved Internet art form in an episode called "Animated GIFs: The Birth of a Medium."

The GIF experts PBS interviewed -- including Tumblr's TopherChris and artists Reed + Rader -- all agree that GIFs can be art, but they can't agree on an answer to the eternal question, "Is it pronounced GIF or JIF?"

[pbsoffbook.]

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Following yesterday's animated promo for the return of Community, Joel McHale's other show, The Soup, debuted an epic trailer for the remainder of Community's third season.

The Greendale Seven will return from their hiatus on Thursday, March 15th, in an episode entitled "Urban Matrimony and the Sandwich Arts."

[fark.]

Nick Offerman,Photo,ron swanson,twitter
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Nick Offerman, aka Parks and Recreation's Ron Swanson, is now on Twitter (despite Swanson's less-than-friendly relationship with computers).

In his inaugural tweet, Offerman praised his "hot and hilarious" wife, actress Megan Mullally, who also played one of Ron Swanson's crazy ex-wives (both named Tammy) on Parks and Rec.

His second tweet was a photo of his balls. Obviously.

[dailydot.]

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The Toledo Zoo's nine-month-old elephant, Lucas, certainly seems to like his brand new sand stall. The zoo plans to give Lucas even more enrichment activities when a new elephant exhibit opens in May.

[tastefullyoffensive.]

common red fox,mugging,Photo,urban foxes,When Animals Attack
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A 210 lb. man from Kent, UK, was mugged for his groceries by a common red fox as he was walking home from the local Tesco.

Seb Baker, 29, says that despite his size, the fox wasn't intimidated. It chased him into an alleyway and kept circling him as if to attack.

Baker eventually placated the villainous vulpine with a loaf of garlic bread, allowing him (and the rest of his food) to escape unharmed.

Wildlife expert John Bryant told The Telegraph that Britain's urban foxes are getting bolder, but attacks like this are still rare.

He also advised against Baker's method of avoiding the attempted mugging.

"If a fox is jumping at your shopping bag you need to shout at it and chase it off, not just give it the food," he said. "The best thing to use is a water pistol."

[telegraph.]

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