FAIL

news-shia-labeouf-sweatpants-fail
Via: X17
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Kudos to the young and seemingly continually controversial stud for his commitment to maintaining his sobriety; but dude, mega props for this sweats and socks-tucked-in combo. At least his lady lover friend Mia Goth (the two have been dating on and off since 2012) doesn't mind.


In other news, LaBeouf just won a lawsuit against his uncle, and will receive a $1 million dollar payout. It sounds like LaBeouf's uncle Barry Said is one lowballing, cheap son of a wayward son; and in short, never came through on paying Shia back for an $800,000 loan.


Seriously. Just pay him back!

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To put it lightly: party foul bro. On another note, ball lightning is pretty sick huh?

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"Alcohol-soaked tampon. Alcohol absorbs like fitty times faster through the pooper."

mic drop

Do people like this actually exist?

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Sit down Neil McCabe.

"It's just part of life, I think," proposes McCabe at one point, when he's confronted with the unavoidable fact that more than 130 people have already died from gun violence in the U.S. this year.

This is where Snow channels his inner GoT Jon Snow, and goes off in the most effective, yet vaguely stoic way possible.

"No, it's part of death, Mr. McCabe," responds Snow. "That's death. That's dead people, people who have died as a result of guns."

Stand up. Now leave Neil McCabe.

news-bradenton-burrito-heroin-drug-dealer-caught
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The suspect handed the Blake Medical Center employee a bag of food he said was for a patient. The employee then checked the food inside the bag, and discovered a syringe hidden inside the burrito.

In light of recent news, what's actually unhealthier though? This drug dealer's heroin-infused culinary twist on the traditional burrito? Or whatever slid out Chipotle's kitchen last summer amidst the Norovirus outbreak scandal?

What are the odds Jesse Pinkman had the car running? Walter White is not pleased with all this heat.

news-picture-mike-rowe-bank-robbery-rumor
Via: Uproxx
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Mike Rowe needs you to hear him loud, and hear him clear, when he tells you he's not robbing banks.

The former 'Dirty Jobs' Host and 'Deadliest Catch' narrator's under a great deal of scrutiny after an image of what appears as Mike Rowe from a frickin parallel universe, holding up a bank, surfaced. The resemblance is uncanny, in every sense of the word.

The rumors went viral after various folks across Facebook joked that this was a maddened, wild ploy by Rowe to kickstart a new season of 'Dirty Jobs.'

Rowe was quick to the punch and fought to quell the fast uprising of these rumors by releasing an alibi on his Facebook page: "For what it's worth, I was in Kansas Monday, and can prove it, if need be."

Rowe went on to bury himself in a bit of a hole by offering up something of an outlandish theory, "what if the thief was not an idiot, but a clever person of below average height wearing a Mike Rowe Mask?"

Alright. Will the real Mike Rowe please stand up?

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