coach

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Alamo Drafthouse figures if disruptive movie theater audiences will listen to anyone, they'll listen to Coach Taylor.

Pandering towards that part of us all that wants to make the Friday Night Lights father figure proud, the Austin-based movie theater chain hired Kyle Chandler to reprise the role.

What appears to be the start of another moving and effective speech before another big game gets interrupted by the thoughtless youth with their bleeping and buzzing cellular doodads. Coach loses it and we all feel as shameful as Matt Saracen must have felt when he got drunk with Riggins in the strip club in season two and Coach had to drive him an his injured grandmother home from the hospital. Remember?

The English language should really have one of those specific words to describe what it feels like to disappoint Coach Taylor.

Anyway, the PSA drives the point home in spectacular style with Coach changing the Dillon Panthers' credo into something more on-message for movie theater politeness.

"Clear eyes, full hearts and turn your god damn cell phones off."

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