funny

Censorship of The Day: London Coffee Shop Forced to Replace Brilliant Yet "Offensive" Sign
Via: Mashable
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A coffee shop in London has been forced to remove a sign displaying the shop's name from outside its building.

But the shop's response was rather cheeky.

The coffee shop was rebranded more than a year ago from the more boring "Bermondsey Street Coffee."

Then the owners received this letter this month from the lawyers of the owners of the building.

Seeing as they had no real choice in the matter, they replaced the sign.

Here's the new sign.

Effective? Yes.

Just as funny? Nah.

History Lesson of The Day: Academic Claims Australians Have Accent Because Settlers Were Always Drunk
Via: The Age
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Have you ever wondered why Australians don't finish the ends of their words and generally sound like they're super chill?

It's because their ancestors were super chill. And super drunk.

Dean Frenkel, a communications expert at Victoria University in Melbourne, claims that early Australian settlers from Britain were big fans of alcohol. So much so, that they developed a slurred accent that lives on today.

"Our forefathers regularly got drunk together and through their frequent interactions unknowingly added an alcoholic slur to our national speech patterns," he wrote in The Age.

"For the past two centuries, from generation to generation, drunken Aussie-speak continues to be taught by sober parents to their children."

He says the average Australian only speaks at two-thirds capacity and with improper articulation.

What does the queen have to say about this lazy approach to language?

Hallelujah of The Day: Scarlett Johansson Gets Hot and Heavy Reading Bible Verses
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You'll want to sin after hearing Scarlett Johansson's sexy version of the Holy Bible.

Joining SNL writer and cast member Mike O'Brien on Tasty Radio, ScarJo offers up a titillating rendition of Deuteronomy that will make any Bible believer blush.

Slavery, forced marriage, stoning, cutting people's hands off— the Old Testament never sounded so hot!

Lord, forgive us.

Whoops of The Day: A Giant Blimp is on The Loose Somewhere Over Pennsylvania
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Someone has got some explaining to do.

A giant U.S. surveillance blimp came untethered today around noon and is now floating 16,000 feet over Pennsylvania. Oh, and two F-16s have been deployed to monitor the situation.

The blimp is part of the Joint Land Attack Cruise Missile Defense Netted Sensor System (JLENS), a radar system used to pick up aerial threats.

But now it has become a threat itself to the good people of Pennsylvania, who are being advised to call 911 if they spot the monstrosity.

And because people on the Internet are horrible, they made some dumb jokes about the blimp.

Blimp 2K15, where are you?

Flavor Town of The Day: Supermodel Chrissy Tiegen Dressed as Guy Fieri for Halloween
Via: GQ
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Get ready, because model Chrissy Tiegen is about to take you on a ride through FLAVOR TOWN.

Forget all of those sexy Halloween costumes. Those are so 2014.

Your eyes won't even be able to comprehend her costume. It is so magnificent, so beautiful, so flavorful.

That's right. Sports Illustrated swimsuit cover model Chrissy Tiegen is Guy Fieri.

She just won Halloween. Go home, everyone.

Fail of The Day: Museum Cleaners Tossed This Art Installation Because They Thought it Was Trash
Via: IBT
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Cleaners at the Museion modern art gallery in Bolzano, Italy thought a recent art installation was trash.

Literally.

The modern art piece entitled "Where are we going to dance tonight?," which features the leftovers of a dance party, was inadvertently tossed in the rubbish bin by cleaners.

From International Business Times:

Meant to represent consumerism, hedonism and the blending of revelry and politics of 1980s Italy, the installation depicted the aftermath of a party, with empty champagne bottles, confetti and cigarette stubs scattered all over the floor.

So, when a cleaning lady attended to tidy up the premises, she assumed the items was a pile of rubbish. Gallery curator Letizia Ragaglia said the mistake was partially due to the fact that the employee was new at the museum and thus unfamiliar with its exhibitions.

Luckily, the trash bags had not been thrown away when the museum discovered the mistake.

Offer of The Day: Sex Toy Maker Will Give Justin Bieber $1 Million to Endorse Product
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Nothing says vibrating replica-penis kit like Justin Bieber.

At least that is what one sex toy company thinks.

Clone-A-Willy, a personal penis duplicator that allows a user to cast an exact replica of their member, is offering the singer $1 million if he endorses the company's products.

"Justin Bieber, he's popular, talented and now as the entire world knows ... quite well-endowed. You can only imagine ... a huge billboard of Justin Bieber and "Clone-A-Willy" in West Hollywood. It would surely do wonders to help promote his new album and certainly wouldn't hurt his "dating" life," a letter sent to The Huffington Post said.

After nude photos of Bieber leaked earlier this month, the singer said he "felt violated."

So his endorsement will probably never happen.

But what could a Bieber endorsement look like? This, probably.

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