Lunch Rush: This edition brought to you by Pineapple Zombie.

What else?

• TDW Geek: Pokemon in the style of Tim Burton will blow your mind
• Creepy: The George W. Bush Presidential Museum will play 9/11 on a loop
• Ridic: Joel Tenenbaum is on the hook for $675,000 for illegally distributing 31 songs on Kazaa
• Lame: The White House will release its beer recipe, but only if 25,000 sign an online petition
• RIP: Jerry Nelson, the voice of the Count and a gazillion other muppets
• Oh, Really: A new study finds that women who regularly have unprotected sex are heathier and happier

Lunch Lady: Ashleigh Snow

Lunch Leisure: Think Tank (via)

Lunch List: The 40 Best Tumblr Pics And GIFs From 1994

Lunch Rush: Today's edition is brought to you by Wannabe Ceiling Cat.

What else?

• TDW Geek: Dear Peach -- Luigi still loves you.
• Bullsh*t: The mayor of Tampa is promising to call off the RNC if Tropical Storm Isaac threatens.
• Unimpressive: Microsoft updates its logo for the first time in 25 years
• Awesome: Dave Grohl, for beering a fan during a recent show
• Despicable: A lesbian in Nebraska has been arrested for faking her own hate crime.

Lunch Lady: Carol Menendez

Lunch Leisure: Handheld Video Game (via)

Lunch List: The 20 Most Awful Things On Instagram

Lunch Rush: Today's edition is brought to you by Venus the two-faced cat.

What else?

• TDWGeek: Doctor Who gets a spin-off web series called Pond Life.
• Ridic: French tourists in Sri Lanka have been jailed for pretending to kiss a Buddha statue.
• Naturally: Ohio GOP chair Doug Preisse thought his racist comments were off the record.
• Yeesh: The current West Nile outbreak is America's largest ever.
• Bad-ass: A couple headed to Albuquerque, NM, to visit every place ever featured in Breaking Bad.
• Ew: Nike is planning to unveil its biggest waste of money yet -- a $315 LeBron high-top.

Lunch Lady: Olivia Nguyen

Lunch Leisure: Jumping Line (via)

Lunch List: The 5 Most Ridiculous Drinking Myths You Probably Believe

Lunch Rush: This edition brought to you by Sandal Socks.

What else?

• TDW Geek: The cat who "sings" the Game of Thrones theme
• Pitiful: Newsweek concedes that it didn't fact-check its cover story by Niall Ferguson, "Hit The Road, Barack"
• Finally: Jimmy Kimmel will move to 11:30 and face off against Leno and Letterman
• Strange: "Mitt Romney and Paul Ryan" is an anagram for "My Ultimate Ayn Rand Pr0n"
• Predictable: A pr0n star's syphilis has shut down the industry indefinitely
• Official: Junior Seau's autopsy showed no signs of alcohol or illicit drugs
• Weird: AMC is sending a zombie to the upcoming conventions to protest Dish Network

Lunch Lady: Natacia Bhatia
Lunch Leisure: Jumping Line (via)
Lunch List: 14 Uncommon Celebrity Look-Alikes

Lunch Rush: This edition brought to you by Newsweek, whose issue this week covers an essay by Niall Ferguson that argues for an Obama loss come November.

What else?

• TDW Geek: The studio behind The Secret of Kells is out with a new trailer
• Rumored: Nicki Minaj will judge American Idol
• Ridiculous: A valedictorian has been denied her diploma for saying "hell" in her speech
• Sad: The Girl With the Butthole Tattoo explains why she got it
• Finally: Scientists have discovered a male birth control pill that doesn't affect sex drive and has no side effects

Lunch Lady: Heather Darling

Lunch Leisure: Farm Fortress (via)

Lunch List: The 15 Creepiest Background Lurkers Who Aren't Cats

Today on TDW Geek: The sound of a dying star

What else?

• Evolving: Domino's, into an artisan restaurant chain that is moving away from pizza
• Discovered: The original character descriptions for the cast of Friends
• Worth It: Sparkle, for Whitney Houston, according to critics
• Celebrate: Today is Black Cat Appreciation Day!
• Exists: A treadmill made specifically for overweight dogs
• Banned: Annoying hipster conversations, at a coffee house in San Francisco

Lunch Lady: Kimberly Diane

Lunch Leisure: OWWW (via)

Lunch List: The 33 Best Tumblr Pics From 1999

[image: failbook]

Today on TDW Geek: Penelope Cruz pimps Mario

What else?

• Well Played: A man drove from Portland to Seattle to get his stolen bike back
• Stuck: Julian Assange, in the Ecuadorian Embassy in the U.K., after Ecuador granted him political asylum
• Super: Ikea is jumping into the hotel biz in Europe
• Holy Schnikes: The average U.S. citizen reads a novel a day in email, signs, websites, etc.

Lunch Lady: Ashley Brooke

Lunch Leisure: Deepak Fights Robots (via)

Lunch List: 12 Personal Robots That Could Change Your Life

[image: failblog]