santa

Via: ODN
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Listen up, drug dealers, if you sell your garbage on these streets, consider yourself on the naughty list.

That’s right, Santa Claus is coming to town, and this time, it’s personal.

via South Park

This year, Santa’s got a whole new bag because anti-drug units in Peru are dressing like Father Christmas, perhaps so they can gain entry into any house without a warrant via the chimney. However, Ol’ Saint Nick wasn’t so jolly after a brief stop in Peru, where he raided a suspected drug house, apprehending four individuals who wish they were getting coal this Christmas.

So next time you’re thinking about breaking the law, remember, he’s always watching.

via Toons Artie

new santa cam replaces elf on a shelf this christmas
Via: 888 Infinite Designs
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Move over, Elf on a Shelf, because Santa Claus is coming to town.

You'll be seeing some new, futuristic modes of surveillance this Christmas, as two new Santa Cameras hit the shelves. Meant to scare children into behaving, these new Claus-monitoring systems aim to replace the Elf on the Shelf as the premiere Santa surveillance hardware.

Created by Emmiroo’s Photography & Gifts, the Santa Camera looks like a security camera you'd see in a store, however, this supposedly has a direct line to the big man himself, who presumably sits in a room surrounded by television screens as a opposed to doing his job. This leads to an important question: Is Santa Claus' magic bound to the technology available at the time, or has he always had these security cams and chose not to use them.

Santa is bringing some next level fear and intimidation this holiday season. The Cam even comes with a cryptic note written by Kris Kringle, indicating that he’s got “keep a very close eye on you all.” We don't know what Santa thinks we did, but whatever it is, we're sorry.

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In addition to the physical camera, Santa Cam ornaments are also set to appear on Christmas trees this holiday season.

 

via @8infinitedesign

It’s only a matter of time before a whistleblower leaks the wide range of intel Santa’s collecting in the North Pole, Snowden style.

Check out The Huffington Post for more on the terrifying future we now live in.

via GIPHY

little boy receives block of wood instead of ps4
Via: UPI
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Nine-year-old Scott Lundy was so excited to receive a PS4 this christmas until he opened the box and found a wooden replica of the system placed there by thieves. To add insult to injury, they included a "crude drawing of male genitals" (missed opportunity for a dickbutt) on the wood and a message that said "from cock and balls with love."



Scott's parents were able to return the console to Target and get a replacement, but Scott's faith in Santa Claus is shaken. I guess Call of Duty: Black Ops III and The Uncharted Collection will be there to carry him through this difficult time.

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Yorkdale's Fashion Santa is Killing It This Season

A merry mix between Zoolander and Santa, Yorkdale Shopping Center in Toronto, Ontario has employed the most fashion-foward Santa any mall Santa could hope to be. See how this new Saint Nick is nailing Holiday cheer, with merry modeling poses, hot holiday fashion tips, and festive selfies with everyone (including Justin Bieber).

fashion christmas list justin bieber social media santa mall santa - 704261
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news-crazy-runaway-reindeer-nottingham
Via: Mashable
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Hide yo kids, hide wives, hide yo husbands, and definitely hide yo grandmas. The only way we could make this very real life story of a reindeer running amok through the tea-soaked streets of a temporarily improper Nottingham, is if Arnold Shwarzznegger reprised his role from Jingle All The Way, to catch the runaway reindeer.

Somebody must've slipped something in Bjorn the reindeer's eggnog Sunday, because he went buckwild.

"I was putting some Christmas cards up in the window and just saw it come charging down the street," local resident Gemma Green told the Nottingham Post. "Then I saw a group of people following it.

"It was quite strange. It's like the scene from Arthur Christmas where Santa loses his reindeer. I thought I was seeing things at first." Maybe she was, but heck if that's a way to spur some Christmas spirit.

Via: Kanal Dizimatik
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In a West Virginia Walmart, this little girl spotted Santa and stopped to have a chat. He's clearly trying to get some shopping done under cover but with that white beard and a red shirt, he was found out immediately.  

But is he the REAL Santa? He knows exactly how to respond to this little girl, plus he has a real beard.  There's really no proof that he's not Santa. If he encountered Will Ferrel, he'd probably pass for Santa.