Early Bird Special: Rebecca Black performs on America's Got Talent.

I love opposite day! Wait, I mean I hate opposite day. Or is it I love to hate opposite d... ah, screw it -- Rebecca Black sucks.

[vvv.]

Talented Glow-Light Dance Group of the Day: Team iLuminate made their triumphant return to America's Got Talent last night, and their performance was nothing short of iridescent.

[reddit.]

America's Got A Susan Boyle of the Day: It's the annual "March of the Susan Boyle-Alikes" in the US again, and an early contender for this year's title is Cindy Chang -- a 42-year-old homemaker who snorts when she laughs and whose parents shot down her dream of becoming a professional singer.

[vvv.]

The Interpipes Are Leaking of the Day: Iconic Internet personality Jay "Tron Guy" Maynard goes on America's Got Talent to show off his homemade costume and tell his story.

Things go as well as can be expected.

[vvv.]

Kids Got The Darndest Talent of the Day: Three adorable tykes who started wappin' one day while listening to the wadio and want to use their prize money to buy a big, big house for homeless kids and fill it with lots of toys so they can play all day?

Show's over.

[thanks magda!]