Slow News Day of the Day: An adorable lil' assassin makes a precious attempt on President Obama's life in plain sight of 17 Secret Service agents and his mommy.

[wonkette.]

Slow News Day of the Day: Tony Cenicola's "pinup chicken" photo for a New York Times article on chicken skin snacks is pretty much a Pulitzer-in-waiting (or is that "poulizer"?).

Just how celebrated is Cenicola's sexy chicken pic? The Times wrote an entir

Slow News Day of the Day: A marquee in Boise, Idaho, announcing a September 11th concert by instrumental post-rock band Explosions in the Sky is causing some controversy because we've apparently run out of things to be upset about.

NBC New York called the concert "poorly timed" and reminded readers that "th

Slowest News Day Ever of the Day: From Sheffield's daily newspaper, The Star: "Two ghostly faces formed in a Doncaster man’s knees have become a family joke. Dad John Martin first spotted the two ‘faces’ apparently staring out of his 20-year-old son Ben’s kneecaps as they both sat watching the television at the family home at Catterick Close,