Mariah Carey was recently caught lip syncing at the Dick Clark's New Year Rockin' Eve 2017. She "performed" her hit songs, 'We Belong Together' and 'Emotions' with zero f**ks given.
Looks like Charles isn’t so in charge these days, unless he’s charge-ing someone with assault.
Note to self: Punch up that lead. Pun intended. Let’s try another.
2016 has officially jumped the shark.
Note to self: That’s the one.
Apparently, Scott Baio has filed a police report against the wife of Red Hot Chili Peppers drummer Chad Smith, Nancy Mack. Attending a school event, where both of their children attend, Mack allegedly confronted Baio, one of the president-elect’s most ardent supports, and berated him, grabbed him, and screamed “Grab ‘em by the pussy” at him.
As the Fonz would say, “Hey… if the president can say it.”
Well, apparently, that’s what Mack said too, inadvertently quoting the Fonz. She was merely “trying to show Baio how Trump hugs women,” TMZ reports. “Baio asked Nancy to stop, but he claims she kept repeating the comment because she felt everyone needed to hear it, cause Trump used it. Baio told cops at that point Mack attacked him, grabbing him under his arms and then shaking and pushing him.”
If only he still had his powers from the movie Zapped!, you know, where Scott Baio plays a teen with the superpower of being able to remove women’s clothes with his mind. Actually that probably would’ve made the situation a lot worse, especially considering she’s bringing up the time the president-elect admitted to sexually assaulting women because “when you’re a star, they let do it.”
Anyway, sit on it, 2016. Yowsah, yowsah, yowsah. Up your nose with a rubber hose. Wait, that’s Welcome Back, Kotter.
The 1980s were a dangerous time for many of us, but it was especially dangerous if you were from a specific demographic: A sitcom mother.
Go ahead, think about it. Have you ever noticed that while you were watching reruns of Diff’rent Strokes or Full House that there was never a mom around? To paraphrase a 90s sitcom, what’s the deal with that?
This was no accident. There was a reason why so many sitcoms were about single fathers dealing with multiple children, and the After Hours team at Cracked took a quick look at why “audiences tuned in week after week to laugh at grieving families and abandoned children?”
In this video, Cracked uncovers the reason that the 80s were such a bad time to be a sitcom mom, or a sit-mom, as I’ll refer to them. Some reasons include: the success of the first example, Diff’rent Strokes led to copycats; the removal of a show’s moral center (the mother) would result in “dad’s burning dinners and uncomfortably buying bras,” as well as unaccompanied minors playing in a dump and getting stuck in a fridge. But ultimately, they discover that these shows were a response to rising divorce rates and the breakdown of the American nuclear family.
Check out the video and learn a little something about how the 80s were a golden age of abandoned kids and idiot fathers.
In the past few days, The Simpsons has been looked at as some sort of cartoon crystal ball, after successfully predicting Donald Trump’s 2016 presidential win in the year 2000.
Now that the prophecy has come to pass, many wanted to know why they even bothered to make that joke in the first place. Well, wonder no longer. For as it was written, The Hollywood Reporter interviewed the writer who made the joke.
"It was a warning to America," said writer Dan Greaney. “The important thing is that Lisa comes into the presidency when America is on the ropes, and that is the condition left by the Trump presidency. What we needed was for Lisa to have problems that were beyond her fixing, that everything went as bad as it possibly could, and that's why we had Trump be president before her.”
"I am tickled we are getting all this attention, but I don't think it's going to trigger this well-awaited re-evaluation of my episode that I was hoping for.”
So there you have it: It wasn’t a prediction, it was a warning that we failed to heed. Everything’s fine. Well, now that that’s settled, who wants to get some frosty chocolate milkshakes? Anyone? Anyone?
Jeopardy! has been making quite a comeback in the past few months — what with Alex Trebeck rapping and calling his contestants losers and all. But last night, a contestant on Jeopardy!’s Teen Tournament took the gameshow back for the players.
During "Final Jeopardy!," the contestant, Sabrina, didn't stumble when she didn't know the answer. Instead, she shut Jeopardy! down with an Internet-ready response worth all the Daily Doubles in the world.
Her response to the answer “Roughly half the size of Texas, it's the largest structure made by living creatures and can even be seen from space” was...
Forget that the answer is "The Great Barrier Reef" because this is all that matters now.
And the crowd went wild:
Your move, Trebek.
Following a delightful song and dance number between Late Show-host Stephen Colbert and an innocent ragamuffin, the Mayor of Candytown himself, Jon Stewart, dropped in to offer the audience some “toffee from an old man’s pants.” But upon learning that Donald Trump is running for president, Stewart, who’s a little out of the loop these days, gave his patented spit-take salute in surprise. Time to get back to work… after a little Yentil, for which there is always time.
Hamilton's Javier Muñoz, an astronaut, a crossing guard, and, of course, an adorable orphan joined other classic symbols of Americana, Colbert, and Stewart on stage to remind the audience to get out and vote. Make this old man’s wish come true, America.
And now, what we’ve all been waiting for, gifs of people doing spit takes!
The election ends tomorrow, which means that late night TV is about to get a whole lot more boring (unless of course you're really in watching Channing Tatum play Twister — in which case, it’s about to become a whole lot more exciting). But that doesn’t mean we can’t have one final, hardy guffaw at the moments that defined these truly terrible and awful eight months.
Saturday Night Live closed out the election season with an awe-inspiring final debate between Kate McKinnon's Hillary Clinton and Alec Baldwin's Donald Trump, but what of the other great moments of this election cycle, the sketches and segments that kept up sane this past year?
From Jon Oliver’s blistering new nickname for Donald Trump to SNL's instant-classic “Black Jeopardy,” Wired has catalogued the best late night TV comedy of the year. Fall in love all over again with Jon Stewart popping in on Colbert and Jimmy Fallon tussling Donald Trump’s hair. We won’t believe it happened when it’s over, so revel in it all today. Check out Wired’s timeline of the sketches that defined the election here.
And to that we say, so long, Election 2016, you brought out the worst in all of us, and we’re happy to see you go.
Here's another reason to live past Election Day: Dave Chappelle will be hosting Saturday Night Live on November 12. This isn't just big news because Chappelle's the best, but also because it's the first time he'll be returning to sketch comedy since he ended Chappelle's Show in 2006. Not to be outdone, Chappelle will be sharing the stage with musical guest A Tribe Called Quest.
Set your DVRs to stun.
Facebook, a never-ending source of useful information, has been our goto for up-to-the-minute election coverage this past season. As such, it’s probably caused us more anxiety about this election than any one speech, Wikileaks email, or video featuring Billy Bush. Your Facebook wall feeds into your worst fears about the candidates, and Stephen Colbert knows it.
On The Late Show with Stephen Colbert last night, Colbert took a big swig of cough syrup, dusted off his box of Reynolds wrap, and made a new tinfoil hat to block the radio signals that the Illuminati uses to read our minds. Colbert is full of great intel about such things as the whereabouts of Chumbawumba, the shadowy industry of upstate New York weddings, and what oysters actually are. By the end of it, you’ll have your cork board up and long strands of yarn connecting seemingly disparate items together to prove your theory that, hey, what if the Chicken McNugget is more nugget than chicken?
Check out the video and prepare to have your mind blown.
Fuller House, the Full House reunion series that you just had to have, premiered a mere nine months ago, and today, Netflix has released the trailer for the follow-up. That's right, Fuller House will be returning for another round of family-friendly high jinks on December 9.
All your favorites are returning: Stephanie, DJ, Kimmy, and Danny, sporting a new, funky midlife crisis. So if you've been missing the milkman, the paperboy, and/or the evening TV, Fuller House is back because, let's face it, you just had to have this.
Just in time for the holidays, Fuller House season two will drop all at once on December 9, so be sure to carve out some time in your busy holiday schedule to binge on what might be Netflix's most popular show. No, seriously, Fuller House season one brought in over 14-million viewers, which is more eyes on the screen than Game of Thrones or Walking Dead. Yup, an estimated 14.4 million people just had to have this thing, and because of that, we're all getting more.
Just goes to show you, most people just want some light situational comedy, not humans being hacked to death. Go figure.
As the wave of nostalgia continues to plague our culture, yet another beloved property is getting the old reboot: Jim Henson's Muppet Babies. This ain't your father's Muppet Babies, though. Muppet Babies will feature a new, 100% computer-generated look for Kermit, Miss Piggy, Fozzy, and the rest. No word yet as to whether or not Nanny and her infamous green and white stripped stockings will be 100% computer generated.
Oh, also, the characters look absolutely terrifying.
Have you been up at 3am tweet-shaming President Obama recently? Well, watch out, he sees you.
Appearing on Jimmy Kimmel Live!, President Barack Obama took out an iPhone and participated in Kimmel's much-beloved Mean Tweets segment, fielding insult after insult on everything, from some bad shampoo to his choice of jeans. You think dealing with Putin's tough? Try sleeping after being called both the Nickelback of Presidents and the Sharknado of Presidents. Cold blooded.
The final insult of the night came from, you guessed it, Republican presidential candidate, Donald Trump. Under the guise of his @realDonaldTrump handel, Trump lobbed 140 characters of fury at the commander-in-chief.
To which Obama replied, "At least I will go down as a President."
Here's all the news you may have missed:
During the men's marathon on Sunday, Ethiopian long-distance runner Feyisa Lilesa pulled a Hunger Games moment and showed his support for the Oromo Protests in his home country by making a specific motion with his arms:
Showing the sign is highly political though, so when he spoke a press conference after the marathon he said what he risked with the gesture, "If I go back to Ethiopia maybe they will kill me," he said, according to the Sydney Morning Herald.
"If I am not killed maybe they will put me in prison. [If ] they [do] not put me in prison they will block me at airport. I have got a decision. Maybe I move to another country."
Like the Hunger Games, let's hope the people can rise above this oppression.
Fact Check says Trump's First Ad Averages 1 Lie Every 4 Seconds. I can hear Hillary's slow golf-clap from here. Let's hope his next ad doesn't disappoint us either.
I'm just saying, I didn't know it was possible to get an 8-pack:
Great job getting all those Olympic metals, ladies.
Tom Hiddleston and Chris Hemsworth have started filming Thor: Ragnarok in Brisbane, Australia:
Checking pulses.... yep, we're still in love! Looking forward to this next step in the series!
Yep, you can now follow along on super-scientificcy NASA research stuff from the comfort of your home sweatpants:
Now it's time to dig into their data and see if I can create that settlement on Mars next door to Mark Watney.
We here at The Daily What LOOOVE a good conspiracy theory.
Today's fun features oft-hated political commentator, hero of the working class, and millionaire, Michael Moore, theorizing that the Donald was never an actual candidate for President, but was annoyed he wasn't being paid enough by NBC officials for his hit NBS TV shows, "The Apprentice" and "The Celebrity Apprentice," so he ran for office as a stunt to get better ratings and demand a higher paycheck.
According to Moore, Trump "cannot and WILL NOT suffer through being officially and legally declared a loser—LOSER!—on the night of November 8."
Moore continues that Trump "would rather invite the Clintons and the Obamas to his next wedding than have that scarlet letter L branded on his forehead seconds after the last polls have closed on that night."
So what do you think? Think Trump's in it for the money? Rumor has it he may drop out soon, so maybe he thinks he's got a giant TV paycheck coming?
The actress who played Carmen Sandiego has been found, and now we can all high-five ourselves for winning the game!
In a episode-worthy EPIC level of sleuthing (stalking?), Todd Van Luling, a writer for the Huffington Post, tracked down the actress who played Carmen on "Where in Time Is Carmen Sandiego?" which premiered in the fall of 1996. Kids everywhere OBSESSED over finding Carmen and stopping her from stealing the Brooklyn Bridge and other crazy capers.
But did the actress who played Carmen make it easy to find her? Oh no, she hid as only Carmen Sandiego can, and he went looking for clues to her whereabouts by scouring the credits list for clues...
...but finding no one billed as "Carmen," so he visited cities, interviewed suspects, and emailed every person with even a remotely similar name to his suspects list:
Would he ever find out who the REAL Carmen Sandiego was??
Follow the whole caper and discover who Carmen Sandiego REALLY is here.