Tinder, the hugely successfully dating app, will soon be a party game for the whole family.
Just in time for the holidays, Tinder comes to Apple TV, which the company is hoping will make for a new Christmas tradition: Helping your sad child with their sad dating life.
In a press release, Tinder announced their excitement for making Tinder a part of family bonding time. For some reason Tinder is really invested in the idea of the family gathering around the TV and deciding who you hook up with next. In a press release, they pitch a scenario:
“No phones at the dinner table? No problem. Now you can spot Swipe Right potential from across the room. Need a second opinion before you Super Like? Good news: the cousins from Omaha just rolled in. Plus, why swipe alone when you can let Aunt Donna have a say? She’s known you since you were two; she’s watched you grow. If she says you should Swipe Right on that nice girl in the penguin costume, you Swipe Right on that nice girl in the penguin costume. Seriously man, show Aunt Donna some respect.”
They are really concerned with Aunt Donna, considering “she’s known you since you were two; she’s watched you grow.” This is very gross.
The instructions stay on brand:
Yeah, let your sister have a turn. Enjoy Tinder with your sister, Aunt Donna, and the rest of your family because that’s not weird at all.
Anyway, Tinder is coming to Apple TV with a new remote so you can blankly swipe left or right and hope that someone writes you back. Only now, your family can help you choose who you hook up with. How did we ever get by without having Tinder to gross us out?
They have a whole host of videos of the family enjoying Tinder together — again, this is such a strange ad campaign. You can check them out here, if you want to get lost in the saga that is this family using Tinder together.
Everyone in America knows that laptops grow on trees, and there’s no greater proof of this than the TSA’s massive collection of laptops.
The TSA tweeted last week that about 70 laptops — mostly expensive MacBooks by the looks of it — that were left behind at security. Whatever, these people will just walk over to the magic laptop tree and grab a new laptop.
People are regularly doing things like that. Mashable reports, “In a 2014 story, Capital Public Radio in Sacramento, California, reported that roughly 20,000 items, each priced at $500 or more, were left at checkpoints around the country. Those items eventually get sent to TSA's Virginia headquarters, while less valuable objects make their way to re-sale shops.”
If you’re one of the few people who cannot just walk over to the laptop tree and pick a new laptop, there are steps you can take. In addition to sending a message to the TSA on Twitter at or Facebook, you can call their Lost & Found. Just in case you forgot your loaded gun or fingernail thingy.
For better control in video editing, photo editing, or just sending emojis, the new Apple MacBook Touch Bar has a lot of perks, but Apple still buried the lead on this one.
Apparently, you can play a super smushed version of Doom on this thing.
Sure, the Touch Bar is a great way to bring Apple Pay and Predictive Text to the desktop. Replacing the physical function keys at the top of the keyboard, the Touch Bar is a digital interface that's touch sensitive and totally customizable. It’s another great innovation from Apple that allows a wider range of control for users. More importantly, you can play a version of Doom on it that looks like it was crushed by a vice.
Developer Adam Bell crammed the 1993 classic in all of its glory to run on the the narrow 2,160 x 60 pixel OLED touchscreen. Is it pretty? Hell no. Is it pointless? Absolutely.
Announced at the Apple Event in October, the Touch Bar was the centerpiece of the new MacBook Pro laptops. The tech giant hoped to bring some of the benefits of touchscreen computing that has revolutionized handheld products, like the iPad and the iPhone. In doing so, they have given developers yet another place to stick the class video game Doom, and we’re all better for it.
Ew, you're still using an iPhone 7? How quaint.
Despite being just eight weeks old, the iPhone 7 is already old hat, as rumors of the iPhone 8 have already begun to surface. A report from the Nikkei Asian Review says that tests at Foxconn, the infamous iPhone production plant, have started. After all, the iPhone 7 is really old and can barely even function anymore.
Let's breeze past the obvious new features of the iPhone 8. It will likely be the thinnest, lightest, and fastest iPhone ever, with the best camera ever put in an iPhone. Cool. Where's the good stuff?
"Hon Hai Precision Industry, better known as Foxconn Technology Group, is making wireless charging modules," says Nikkei. Finally, wireless charging, and to think, the iPhone 7 (remember that thing?) still uses a wire.
The addition of wireless charging should please iPhone 7 users. If you can recall about 60 days ago, Apple took a “courageous” step and removed headphone jacks from their phones, leaving just one port to charge the battery and listen to music. But who can even remember such things? It was so long ago.
One thing's for sure, these are all unconfirmed rumors, and we have no idea when the next iPhone will actually be released. In the meantime, you'll just have to stick it out with your decrepit iPhone 7. Who knows? Maybe 2017 will be the year we finally get the Transformer iPhone.
Apple's new Macbook doesn't just give feels, it requires them.
Announcing a new line of Macbooks today, Apple introduced the world to the Touch Bar, a digital interface that lives at the top of the keyboard, replacing the function keys. The Touch Bar gives users a whole new range of control on things like video editing, audio recording, and sending emojis.
Mashable reports that there is a way to charge your new iPhone 7 AND use headphones at the same time: by buying a $39 phone dock to charge your phone on and plug your headphones into THAT.
Contrary to popular belief over on Planet Apple, however, we humans do NOT like to be tethered to the wall in order to listen to music on our ALREADY-OWNED high-end headphones when our battery is low, so we'd prefer a better setup, thanks.
So until further notice, Apple, we are still needing you to make a splitter that will allow headphones AND a charging cable, but at least there is this quick fix to help in the meantime:
Thanks, third party suppliers!
Apple is releasing a bunch of new emoji, many of them include women doing more things than getting their hair done or wearing a tiara. This should be good news to the lady denizens of the internet who have been asking for these emojis for... years, maybe?
But hey, if for some reason you're upset at all the new emojis for women, never fear. The dancing bunny gals got a gender parity emoji added as well:
The real topic of controversy is actually centered around Apple's decision to totally remove guns from the line up. They've opted to replace it instead with an adorable, green squirt gun. Some people hate this decision, a lot:
via @DanicaPatrick, @SwiftOnSecurity, @BrianMediner, @kylethale
Others are a little more accepting or just don't care.
via @BiggChris_76, @AnthonyCumia, @TonyLoweYoYoYo, @PDbitchwork
Okay, they mainly just don't care. Who's out there texting people pictures of guns anyway?
This doesn't look pleasant.
A Danish man is claiming that his Apple Watch gave him "severe burns" on his wrist and fingers, but the tech company says "No way."
Jorgen Mouitzen was in a restroom when he said he felt pain and smelt burning flesh. He quickly realized it was coming from his Apple Watch, he told Yahoo News.
Mouitzen says he rushed to remove the watch, burning his fingers in the process.
Apple has examined the watch and said the watch could not have caused the burns. There are no active electronics in the band.
Nevertheless, Mouitzen still believes the watch was responsible.
"There was nothing else around that could have heated the strap up other than the watch," he said.
Yesterday, Apple had one of its events which makes you spend the next few hours madly adjusting your spending expectations for the year. There, they announced the Apple Pencil.
It's a neat little thing, but it's also a total stylus with a fancy name and a $100 price tag.
So, the Internet had at it.
APPLE PENCIL OMG WHAT THE HECK I AM DEAD pic.twitter.com/2MMi0C5ErM— Justine Ezarik (@ijustine) September 9, 2015
I hope the next version is called the Apple No.2 Pencil.— Ben Parr (@benparr) September 9, 2015
Apple Pencil gets laughs in a room of people specifically chosen not to laugh at dumb names of things.— Jeff Cannata (@jeffcannata) September 9, 2015
2014: bigger phones! 2015: apple pencil 2016: apple fax machine 2017: apple pager 2018: apple abacus https://t.co/LLJe2QWSWv— arit john (@aritbenie) September 9, 2015
There were also a lot of the jokes you would completely expect, but still welcome.
kid - can I get the new Apple pencil? parents - sure here u go pic.twitter.com/nNZ0nUBlUW— Jenny (@xojennydey) September 9, 2015
And then there was the Apple Pencil Pro:
But the troll of all trolls came from America's diner and weird Twitter participant — Denny's.
introducing denny's toothpick. your teeth, performing at full potential. pic.twitter.com/a8uxWmAwXF— Denny's (@DennysDiner) September 9, 2015
You probably know that Apple held their annual phone update press conference today. However, you might not know that the tech behemoth also announced a new iPad and a refreshed Apple TV.
Let us give you the basic run down of all the things you need to know about this most recent event.
Something strange is happening in Pakistan.
Team Android has discovered a bizarre Easter egg in Google Maps that shows the Android logo peeing on the Apple logo.
To check it out yourself, just go to these coordinates, and you will be sent to Rawalpindi, Pakistan.
Another piece of Google Maps graffiti was later found in the Takht Pari Forest, which you can see below.
It is believed to be the result of someone abusing Google’s Map Maker tool, and the company issued a statement to The Daily Mail.
“We’ve terminated the Android involved in this incident, and he’ll be disappearing from Google Maps shortly,” said a Google rep.
And Pascal Hartig, a Twitter engineer, also pointed out that it was a random user.
So yes, it would appear that Google Maps review process could use a little work.
Head on over to Pakistan and soak it up now before it’s gone.
Apple CEO Tim Cook is making headlines Thursday, and not because of a new Apple Watch, iPhone or iPad. In a column for Bloomerg Businessweek, Cook has come out to the public as a gay man.
"While I have never denied my sexuality, I haven't publicly acknowledged it either, until now. So let me be clear: I'm proud to be gay, and I consider being gay among the greatest gifts God has given me."
He admits that many of his colleagues already knew, and he has not been silent in the past about speaking up publicly on discrimination.
He also says that privacy is a big issue for him, but "if hearing that the CEO of Apple is gay can help someone struggling to come to terms with who he or she is, or bring comfort to anyone who feels alone, or inspire people to insist on their equality, then it's worth the trade-off with my own privacy."