Here are this week's insults and roasts that are so creative and ingenious that they just might be impossible to recover from...
Enjoy this collection of insults you don't see often and check out the previous list for even more innovative savagery.
Some of these uncommon insults are so distinguished they might qualify for a Pulitzer Prize. It takes a truly ingenious mind to come up with descriptors this imaginative, and such brilliance deserves to be celebrated. This top ten compilation is the least we can do.
Stare in awe at these rare insults and then check out out previous list for even more poetic savagery.
If I was an art teacher I would feel proud if my students came up with such rare, creative insults. It takes an especially imaginative brain to come up with such unique descriptors. Save your favorite ones, they might come in handy in a future YouTube comments argument.
Enjoy these A+ insults and check out the previous list for even more savage burns that you don't come across very often.
Yes, getting absolutely crushed by words is probably painful... but it must be at least a little satisfying to know that somebody put time and thought into coming up with such a creative description for you.
How does that old saying go? Sticks and stones may break my bones, but chains and whips... Wait, no, that's the wrong one.
Words cut deep, especially when it's obvious that somebody took the time out of their day to come up with a brand new and exceptionally creative way to insult you. How do you even recover from that?
Back in 2018, researchers at the University of Michigan created the world's smallest computer, measuring just 1x1 mm. Unfortunately, the tiny device loses all of its programming and data as soon as it's turned off, so it's up in the air as to whether it actually has the "minimum functionality required" to count as a legitimate microcomputer. But fortunately for us, it's become part of this new dank meme, which features a picture of the tiny computer next to a grain of rice. Scroll down to see some of our favorite examples!
An oldie of a Tumblr post but still very much relevant and important. When a mom from Utah, posted on her blog about a Japanese-themed party she threw for her daughter, Tumblr somehow got a hold of it and started dragging the mom for encouraging racism. Then commenters started stepping in, one of which who was actually Japanese, decided to set the record straight.
In the ongoing war between Apple and Samsung, the battle has turned not towards more practical and useful products and services, but rather which company can impart the most damage on its users.
As has been reported, and even mocked by the president and Grand Theft Auto, Samsung has been the champion of flamable phones for the past few months. Samsung has been an innovator in how to leave their users with burns thanks to the explosive Galaxy Note 7 smartphone.
That was until the Silicon Valley stalwart Apple has had their say.
After falling asleep watching a movie on her iPhone 7, a pregnant Australian woman awoke to several “superficial” burns on her arm, leaving “an imprint of the phone and charger etched into her skin,” according to Metro.
While she’s probably relieved that the phone didn’t blowup, Melanie Tan Pelaez did claim to also “experience sudden pain, pins and needles, numbness and shortness of breath.” Genius Bar can’t fix that.
The burns, Pelaez was told, wouldn’t be covered under the warranty, as Apple “allegedly denied that the phone was to blame ‘as it didn’t have a distinct smell’ and told her the phone usually shuts down if overheating occurs.” The phone has since been sent to California for testing.
Hey, if it doesn’t smell like an Apple burn, it’s not an Apple burn. Now, let’s see Samsung build an explosion with a signature smell. Google Pixel, you smell what we're cooking?
This doesn't look pleasant.
A Danish man is claiming that his Apple Watch gave him "severe burns" on his wrist and fingers, but the tech company says "No way."
Jorgen Mouitzen was in a restroom when he said he felt pain and smelt burning flesh. He quickly realized it was coming from his Apple Watch, he told Yahoo News.
Mouitzen says he rushed to remove the watch, burning his fingers in the process.
Apple has examined the watch and said the watch could not have caused the burns. There are no active electronics in the band.
Nevertheless, Mouitzen still believes the watch was responsible.
"There was nothing else around that could have heated the strap up other than the watch," he said.