happy hour

Know This:

• Tony Nicklinson, the U.K. man with locked-in syndrome who fought for his right to die, died today of natural causes.
• An anonymous Navy SEAL will release a tell-all account of the Bin Laden raid.
• Americans throw away 40 percent of their food every day.
• Brothers in New York have launched a business that puts ads on toilet paper.

Read This:

• From Collectors Weekly: When the wild imagination of Dr. Suess fueled Big Oil.
• From The New Yorker: Love in the age of digital reproduction -- or, on YouTube marriage proposals.
• From Slate: What should Aurora do with its movie theater?

Watch This:

• An auto shop tricks out a kid's car for free after it was repeatedly vandalized because the kid is gay.
• Dramatic readings of Obama campaign emails.
• Axe is back with a hilarious new ad. Wait for it...
• Another round in the epic battle of man vs. moose.

Look At This:

• A collection of awful buildings designed to look like other things.
• You'll never guess which states buy the most sex toys.
• An old lady attempted to restore a valuable religious fresco. She failed.

Happy Hour Tumblr: Little Face Mitt

Happy Hour List: The 13 Craziest Pervert Deaths Of All Time

[image: dallaslovesyou]

Know This:

• Will Smith will direct his daughter, Willow, in a big-screen Annie remake with tunes by Jay-Z.
• You can order Happy Birthday greetings from the White House -- for free!
• You can also create your own top search result -- for free!
• Kelly Ripa's new co-host is Michael Strahan.
• A Freedom of Information Act request has been filed for the Obamas' beer recipe.
• The Office is finally, blessedly calling it quits after this season.

Read This: 

• From Gay4Soccer.com: An athlete's life in the closet -- one Tar Heel's tale.
• From CNN: Inside the GOP's tough anti-abortion platform.
• From Buzzfeed: How to deal with an unruly passenger on a cross-country flight.

Watch This:

• The trailer for 17 Girls, a flick based on the so-called teen pregnancy pact in Gloucester, MA.
• The Ultimate Trampoline Fails Compilation.
• The leaked iPhone 5 official promo.

Happy Hour Tumblr: Dogshaming

Happy Hour List: The Most Beautiful And Imaginative Public Schools In The World

Know This:

• Science confirms -- the only workday we like is Friday.
• Roger Clemens will return to the mound Saturday for the Sugar Land Skeeters.
• The royal corgis got in a brutal dogfight with Princess Beatrice's beloved terrier.
• The Lost-themed nursery is now a thing.
• The NYPD is investigating an incident of bacon at a Ramadan event as a hate crime.

Read This:

• From WorldWideInterweb: The funniest job resumes of all time.
• From The Week: How the Internet saved a dog stranded at 14,000 feet.
• From The New York Times: Can't new moms get a break when it comes to their bodies?

Look At This:

• Surreal images of the Deepwater Horizon incident, taken just after the explosion.
• This is how Facebook sold advertising in 2004. Hahahahaha.
• The Darkness has a new album, and its cover features bikini girls on giant pancakes.

Happy Hour Tumblr: I, Romney

Happy Hour List: The 7 Best Scenes Tony Scott Ever Directed

[image: jest]

Know This:

• Pussy Riot has released a new single -- "Putin Lights Up The Fires" -- in the wake of two-year jail sentences for three of its members.
• A 21-year-old Marine was killed in Afghanistan by an Afghan police officer after the two shared a meal.
• The Army suicide rate hit an all-time high in July, with 38 confirmed or suspected.
• Sharks are killed at a rate of 73 million per year -- they should be afraid of us.
• A fourth Celebrity Rehab alum has died.
• Introducing Offbeatr, a Kickstarter for the pr0n industry.

Read This:

• From Collectors Weekly: The covert history of the American condom.
• From Grantland: Meet Dr. Ann McKee, the woman who could save football.
• From SunSentinel: An Air France flight, out of gas and stuck in Syria, asked passengers for gas money.
• From the Guardian: "I wish my mother had aborted me."

Watch This:

• If you haven't seen Hot Cheetos and Takis...
• The dad rap to end all dad raps.
• This is what happens when you shoot a shotgun like a handgun.

Look At This:

• A collection of 2012 fall movie previews based solely on their posters.
• In Quebec, a garden of decaying books.
• 3D virtual tours of the world? Yes, please!

Happy Hour Tumblr: Mo Farah Running Away From Things

[image: lizclimo]

Know This:

• Now this is how you make a Tom Collins.
• Walter White is wanted for meth manufacturing -- in real life!
• An L.A. restaurant is offering a 5 percent discount to customers who give up their phones upon arrival.
• 3D-printed meat may be the food of the future -- but ew, weird.
• A 20-something is defending his racist YouTube rant by saying he was drunk.

Read This:

• From Uproxx: Shark Week was invented by three drunk dudes in a bar.
• From Slate: Should Facebook be nationalized to protect user rights?
• From Politico: Managing Joe Biden is Mission Impossible.

Watch This:

• The Onion narrates our horrifying planet -- first up, Spiders.
• First, the killer Five Guys review. Then, the killer Five Guys review remixed.
• Star Wars gets a 30 Rock opening sequence.
• You may have a chance with Kate Upton, according to Kate Upton.
• The Ultimate Mitt Romney Flip-Flopping Compilation -- prepare a snack, you'll need it.

Look At This:

• OMG the official Ryan Gosling coloring book.
• All of these corgis are up for adoption.

Happy Hour Tweet: By @OMGFacts

Happy Hour Tumblr: EatSleepDraw

Happy Hour List: The Sexcapades Of The World's 8 Most Corrupt Leaders

[image: natchadatass]

Know This:

• We can all rest easy -- Jerry Sandusky is writing a book in prison.
• Seventy-seven years after it became law, Social Security is keeping 20 million Americans out of poverty.
• Michael J. Fox is returning to prime time in a series inspired by his own life.

Read This:

• From Hypervocal: The incredible story of the Oregon boy who escaped from an underwear-clad priest.
• From Slate: The thrilling demise of the daily deal business model.
• From the Daily Beast: Jodie Foster to everyone -- "Leave Kristen Stewart alone!"

Watch This:

• Obama gets his own Swift Boat attack ad -- and it's only 22 minutes long.
• What's a McGangbang? Well, if you must know...
• The "iconic movie sunglasses" supercut.
• The safe sex rap -- circa 1993.

Look At This:

• Presenting the 2012 winners of the National Geographic Traveler Photo Contest.
• A Chinese farmer who lost both arms in an accident spent eight years building himself new ones from scrap metal.

Happy Hour Tumblr: Emceez Ansari

Happy Hour List: The 9 Weirdest Ways Kids Are Getting High Lately

[image: scottwise]

Know This:

• The leader of Hungary's anti-Semitic party has just learned he's Jewish.
• Insurance companies have reached a new low. Exhibit A: Progressive defends a policy holder's killer in court.

Read This:

• From the New Yorker: Why nobody cared -- even Obama -- when Wade Page shot up the Sikh temple in Wisconsin.
• From Slate: Why the pallet is the single most important object in the global economy.
• From the Verge: Paul Miller is three months into being disconnected from the Internet for a year -- how's it going?

Watch This:

• Olympic whistling!
• The 24/7 live-action Africam.
• This is what you missed on the L Train at 3 a.m. Sunday. Where were you?!
• Another round of Mitt Romney by the guys at Bad Lip Reading.
• PBS remixes Julia Child a la Mister Rogers and Bob Ross.

Look At This:

• As fall nears(!), a rundown of our summer loves and their possible replacements.
• A photo tribute to Teddy Roosevelt's magnificent sideburns.

Happy Hour Tumblr: Kickstarter

Happy Hour List: The 8 Movies We Never Get Tired Of Watching

[image: benwarheit]

Know This:

• OMG finally -- Jennifer Aniston is engaged.
• A dying man's blinks are key evidence in a murder trial.
• Smuckers has released a bacon-flavored syrup.
• A former Susan G. Komen exec is writing a tell-all memoir called Planned Bullyhood.

Read This:

• From Deadspin: The time has come for America's flight attendants to shut up.
• From the New Yorker: How Paul Ryan captured the GOP.

Watch This:

• Apparently, butthole tattoos are the next big thing. (Not Safe For Work -- expletives, naked chick getting a butthole tattoo.)
• Awesome is what happens when acrobats get caught in a wind tunnel.
• Olympic synchonized swimming + Godzilla audio.

Happy Hour Tumblr: Girl With A Smartphone In A Mirror (Not Safe For Work -- slightly scandalous.)

Happy Hour List: 15 Awesome Vintage Photos Of Tattooed Women

[image: obviouswinner]

Know This:

• Drought-stricken Americans have resorted to Facebook memes to summon the rain.
• An unknown disorder has caused a woman to grow fingernails in place of hair.
• Meryl Streep plays "Marry, Shag, or Kill" with Redford, Nicholson, and Hoffman. Love her.

Read This:

• From Hypervocal: The nicest guy on Reddit used unlimited flight benefits to help strangers.
• From Deadspin: How USA basketball's dominance scared the world into playing better.
• From Slate: Portland, the city where "young people go to retire," has something to teach the rest of the country.

Watch This:

• THIS is how pizza sauce is made -- like a boss.
• Swooooooords!!!
• Ninety-year-old Harry Nelson has attended 18 Summer Olympic Games since 1932.

Look At This: 

• More recreating of childhood photos, this time by four sisters.
• This is what happens when you do 45 self portraits, each one on a different drug.
• Gravity-defying pools that we'd totally swim in if we knew anyone who would let us in.

Happy Hour Tweet: By @Tvoti

Happy Hour Tumblr: The Monkeys You Ordered

Happy Hour List: The 13 Most Incredible Stories About Olympic Medal Winners

[image: @ben_cameron]