We know you're a busy bee and the weekends take you away from your beloved world wide web.
Never fear, dear reader. We've continued pouring over it and gladly present the most pressing links you might have missed this weekend.
We're so good to you.
Katy Perry is Performing at the 2015 Super Bowl - So Now the FCC Has to Worry About chest cannons. [Bilboard]
Sony Made a Masturbatory PS Vita Ad Then Yanked It [The Verge]
JLo and Iggy Azalea Tried To Break the American Music Awards with their Butts [Rolling Stone]
An Artist Broke Auction Records with a $44.4 Million Painting Sold at Sotheby's. Spoiler Alert: Not George W. Bush. [Bloomberg]
SNL Channeled "Schoolhouse Rocks" to Explain Obama's Executive Action on Immigration, But They Got a Lot Wrong [ThinkProgress]
If Murderous Cult Leaders Can Find True Love, So Can You [AP]
A New Study Suggests the Gay Gene is Real, and Therefore, This Guy is Lying [Yahoo]
Hackers Now Have a New Way to Steal All Your Money: Snapchat! [Snapchat]
Transformers IRL: NASA Has Conducted a Successful Flight of a Plane With Shape-Changing Wings [NASA]
Another Dashcam in Russian Captures Something Weird, Probably Aliens [Андрей Казанцев]
Aliens Are Real! Because the Guy in this YouTube Video Says So and The Internet Doesn't Lie. [RT]
As If Ebola and Bed Bugs Weren't Scary Enough, Now New Yorkers Have To Beware of Getting Impaled By Giant Drill Bits [NY Daily News]
Nooooooo! The Horror! The Colbert Report is Ending on Dec. 18 [EW]
You've Seen Sad Keanu. Now Here's Sad Cheeto, Starring Katy Perry [Time]
THIS is How You Carve a Pumpkin [GoPro]
-That Awesome Rooftop Rocket Launch Viewing Party You Had Planned Is Rescheduled Because of a Boat [Space.com]
-Window-less Planes are Coming.. and They Are Terrifying. [Quartz]
-Pope Gets Real: God is Not a Wizard, Big Bang Theory/Evolution Could Be Legit [NPR]
-Say What? Co-Founder of The Weather Channel Doesn't Believe in Global Warming [Mediaite]
-Stop Sharing This Fake 'Days of Darkness' NASA Story! [Huffington Post]