Mitt Romney

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"No props, notes, charts, diagrams, or other writings or other tangible things may be brought into the debate by any candidate."

[thanks, austin!]

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Eight-year-old Alabama resident Cecelia Crawford was not impressed by Mittens' pledge during the debate to fire Big Bird, so today she fired off this sweet little note:

When I grow up I'm going to get married and I want my kids to watch it so do not cut it off. You find something else to cut off!
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Say what you will about Romney's recent missteps -- this 1968 pic, taken during the candidate's missionary days in France while Ann was studying at BYU, is quite the charming romantic gesture.

Too bad so many are calling its release desperate.

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Joe Scarborough's reaction this morning to a clip of Romney on the campaign trail is gold.

[thanks, lisa!]

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Mittens just can't catch a break -- behold his deeply tanned Univision appearance Thursday that has the blogosphere cackling.

"Mitt's Mexican tan?" asked makeup artist Michele Probst. "That was very curious. ... To me, that had to have been someone's idea. Someone said, 'Let's try to relate to people.'"

In an effort to distract from the poor paint job, the campaign today finally released the candidate's 2011 tax returns — the Romneys paid $1.9 million in taxes on $13.7 million in income, which comes out to 14.1 percent.

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This Lunch Rush brought to you by the bear vote.

What else?

  • TDW Geek: Someone created a super-realistic turret from Portal.
  • Hahaha: "Oh, Mitt Romney's not going to be president of the United States. I think everybody knows that." --Nancy Pelosi
  • WTF: Openly gay actor Rupert Everett "can't think of anything worse" than two gay dads.
  • Awesome: Scientists have named a new type of wasp after Lady Gaga.
  • Yikes: Syrian jets attacked Lebanon today.
  • Sad: Lil Wayne takes a shot at Frank Ocean's sexuality.
  • Pitiful: The Boy Scouts covered up/didn't report hundreds of instances of sexual molestation, documents show.

Lunch Lady: Kaki West

Lunch Leisure: Voxel Shooter (via)

Lunch List: 11 Occupy Wall Street Spin-offs You May Have Missed

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Hustler head honcho Larry Flynt took out a full page ad in today's Washington Post, offering $1 million to anyone who could provide information about Mitt Romney's tax returns or various other assets.

Larry clearly hasn't been keeping up with the times, because the people who supposedly have such information only accept Bitcoins.

[buzzfeed]

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In case you missed it, here's Jay Leno's Gangnam Style version of Mitt Romney accepting the Republican nomination for president.

[doobybrain]

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The Lorax goes all Paul Ryan in this animated short from College Humor, which should hold you over until Mittens' coronation tonight at the RNC.

[collegehumor]