If you came here to here about brothers who fart on you, sisters who also fart on you, loud grandpa sneezes and abysmally terrific dad jokes, then you came to the right place. It's kinda wholesome, but also kind of realistically stupid and gross. If you're in it for the puns, here are some of tumblr's most punishingly dad-tastic jokes.
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Via The Local
The 40-year-old British woman gave her twin sons some money to get themselves some chips and then headed for a bar to start deinking.
After leaving them at around 8pm, she was too busy boozing to go looking for them or to alert the police since "she thought they knew the way home".
Needless to say, the police and court had a less relaxed take on this.
Not exactly mother of the year, that one!
Photo: Miguel Discart / Flick
If your parents are unfamiliar with Snapchat filters and perhaps a little "thick", it can be quite easy to mess with them.
So, when a child shows up with a square head during a WhatsApp conversation, motherly instincts are sure to kick into gear.
As is the case with Rebecca Owen, a receptionist from Manchester, UK, and her mother, who was certain her daughter's square head was the result of a food allergy (salmon paste) or even drugs.
News flash: Not everyone who is disabled uses a wheelchair.
Some people don't seem to get this, and they write unnecessary notes to leave on disabled people's vehicles.
Australian mom Justine Van Den Borne, who has Multiple Sclerosis, received a note on her care from an anonymous bully who apparently thought she shouldn't be using a handicapped parking space.
Since the note was anonymous, she took to Facebook and penned an open letter so people understand how such cowardly acts make disabled people feel.
To person that left this on my car last week at Mitcham Shopping Centre- I was diagnosed with Multiple Sclerosis when I was 35. Not just MS but the worst one that never goes away and is slowly crippling my life. My kids have had to deal with things that kids shouldn't ever have to deal with and all of our futures are forever changed. On the day you saw me I was having a good day, I was walking with my daughter unaided having a nice day. Thank you for ruining that. You made me feel like people were looking at me, the exact way I feel when I can't walk properly. I am sick of people like yourself abusing me on my good days for using a facility I am entitled to. A disability doesn't always mean a person has to be wheelchair bound but lucky for you I one day will be. Right now my focus is to walk into my best friends wedding next September and not have to be pushed. I will be 42. Before you ruin another persons day remember you don't know everything and just because you can't see it it doesn't mean a person isn't struggling to put one foot in front of the other.
Think before you post notes on cars, people. It's that simple.
Via hate5six
It's been a downer of a day on the Internet so far, so how about we take a break and watch this simply adorable woman learn learn that her son and his wife are having a baby.
It was filmed by the dad-to-be's brother Sunny Singh, who has quite the eclectic YouTube page, not usually featuring such wonderful things.
Her reaction is completely classic and lends itself so easily to gifs.
Singh talked to Buzzfeed about planning on filming the announcement:
I mostly film hardcore punk bands, weddings, and political protests, but I've been filming my mom being her lively self ever since I first picked up a camera. I caught wind of my brother and sister-in-law's pregnancy before they told my parents and I knew I had to be ready to document their response. Knowing my mom, I had a feeling she would react like this. Not filming it would be a huge oversight on my part!
After this, he may just have to record his mom reacting to things.
Watch it and have a lovely day.
Via Ryan Arakaki
WARNING: Terrible language and laugh-to-keep-from-crying impotent rage in this video.
Via Tanis Jex-Blake
Tanis Jex-Blake posted this photo and letter to Facebook after a trip to the beach:
This is an open letter to the 2 guys and 1 girl who decided to skip work today in Sherwood Park where they were building a house, but instead decided to come to Alberta Beach to relax in the sun, enjoy the water and some beers.
I'm sorry if my first attempt at sun tanning in a bikini in public in 13 years "grossed you out". I'm sorry that my stomach isn't flat and tight. I'm sorry that my belly is covered in stretch marks. I'm NOT sorry that my body has housed, grown, protected, birthed and nurtured FIVE fabulous, healthy, intelligent and wonderful human beings. I'm sorry if my 33 year old, 125 lb body offended you so much that you felt that pointing, laughing, and pretending to kick me. But I'll have you know that as I looked at your 'perfect' young bodies, I could only think to myself "what great and amazing feat has YOUR body done?". I'll also have you know that I held my head high, unflinching as you mocked me, pretending that what you said and did had no effect on me; but I cried in the car on the drive home. Thanks for ruining my day. It's people like you who make this world an ugly hateful place. I can't help but feel sorry for the women who will one day bear your children and become "gross" in your eyes as their bodies change during the miraculous process of pregnancy. I can only hope that one day you'll realize that my battle scars are something to be proud of, not ashamed of.
Watch an interview with Tanis here:
(h/t Global News)
Via huffingtonpost
Tennessee mother, Lacey Buchanan, shares her story through this heartstring-tugging video she made about her son who was born blind and with a cleft palate. She does expose the less-than-kind words that she's heard, which seems less than important when it's countered with the video's uplifting message.
