Popular comic Cyanide and Happiness has given the meme world plenty of comics to exploit - and we're adding another to the list. Their February 10th, 2016 comic, in which a woman requests that her partner talk to her like a f*cking idiot, is ripe for the editing. Here are some of our favorite variations.
pizza
This Tumblr user put together an impressive list of most of the wild people they've met while delivering pizzas.You don't think about it a lot, but absolutely crazy people like pizza too. So it makes sense that someone would have to deliver pizza to some outstanding characters, and it makes extra sense that they'd make an impressive list of the people they've seen. For a wholesome yet short tale of humor and pizza, check out this pizza guy who screwed up and had to stand in the corner.
I Can Has.... Pizza? Cats surprisingly love pizza! And they will do whatever it takes to get some...
These memes have been carefully screened by the overlords and found to be up to scratch to give to you connoisseurs of the internet.
A wise man once told me, You do not need a parachute to skydive. You only need a parachute to skydive twice. I never saw him again. Laugh your butt off even more with some of these fantastic memes that will break through any level of boredom. (Though your level of procrastination will significantly rise)
Need to stay up to date on what the latest trends are on Instagram? Well this list of Instagram memes will not help you with that but it will definitely show you the more ridiculous side of the app.
When you’ve only got 30 minutes to deliver a pizza, you better have a little magic on your side.
Ever the innovators, Domino’s Pizza, the inventor of the Pizza Tracker, is training reindeer to deliver pizza.
According to a press release from Domino’s Japan, they have begun testing reindeer to deliver pizza, cheesy bread, wings, and ice-cold Coca-Cola products right to your doorstep. The animals will be equipped with a GPS, so customers can track the reindeer’s course via smart phone. By the looks of this video, the reindeers, who are transported in a small crate, are treated much better than on the North Pole and genuinely want to deliver pizza.
BREAKING: Domino's Japan is currently testing out a way to deliver pizzas via reindeer pic.twitter.com/6kPCdqk7wj
— Ryan Broderick (@broderick) November 28, 2016
Fortune reports, “Domino’s is still working out the kinks of its new delivery method. The first attempt involved attaching pizza boxes to the reindeer’s back, but those quickly fell off. The second attempt reverted back to tradition: Reindeers pulling pizza in a red sleigh.”
No word yet on if bad tippers get coal instead of pizza. Also, no confirmation on whether or not this is just a hoax or a piece of viral marketing. The press release promises an update on Thursday.
Let’s just hope these reindeer are quick enough to "avoid the Noid."
As technology gets better, fake IDs get worse.
The Daily Hampshire Gazette reports that a woman was arrested outside a bar in Amherst, Mass, after she struck the doorman in the face. Now what could have led to that? When he asked for her ID, she attempted to give him a slice of pizza.
“After being informed that pizza was not a valid means of gaining entry to the establishment, the woman slapped the doorman in the face, according to police, and was issued a trespass notice to stay away from the location.”
Everyone knows that pizza isn’t a valid form of ID, but it is a good bargaining tool, whether you’re trying to get your kid brother to clean your room or you’re trying to lurer the Ninja Turtles back to your layer.
Look, physical violence is never acceptable, but it does seem like a lot of people in this situation had zero chill.
Via ZDNet
Lazy Kiwi's can rejoice! Domino's Pizza has chosen Auckland, New Zealand as the first place they are going to test out drone pizza delivery!
The DRU drone, by maker Flirtey looks pretty good for the task, and we're hoping it will carry a heated bag so we don't get our pie's tepid at our door.
Because nothing's worse than limp pizza.
Read more about Domino's autonomous delivery vehicle innovations here.
Via people
The Marion Country Sheriff's department in Oregon shared this story on their Facebook about how the delivery drivers at a local Domino's saved the life of a loyal customer:
On Sunday, May 8th an alert Domino’s delivery driver called the Sheriff’s Office after a regular customer failed to order a pizza from the Salem area company. Tracey Hamblen, an employee at Domino’s on Silverton Road NE, called the Sheriff’s Office after not speaking with the customer in 11 days. Mr. Hamblen had formed a relationship with the victim because of the regular orders and knew he suffered form severe health issues.
When the Sheriff’s Office arrived at the residence in the 4100 block of Penticton Circle NE, they could hear a man calling for help from inside the residence. Deputies forced entry and found Kirk Alexander, age 48, of Salem down and in need of immediate medical attention.
Thanks to the quick actions of Mr. Hamblen, Mr. Alexander is in stable condition at the Salem Hospital. The Sheriff’s Office would like to personally thank Mr. Hamblen for his quick actions and willingness to take time out of his day to care for others.
