In the words of The Rolling Stones, you can't always get what you want. While this is true, there's very little to stop us from getting angry about it. These simple yet funny memes feature Plankton from Spongebob Squarepants balling up his fists under the word "visible frustration". The words are pretty unnecessary when you consider the tiny character's extremely palpable anger. The format is being used to depict frustration that ranges from PG to XXX, making it supremely versatile and absolutely entertaining. Have at 'em.
Spring is in the air and we're feeling friskier than ever, and chances are we're not alone. Because let's be real, we don't need a season to tell us when it's time to get down or time to take matters into our own, um, hands. To cope with the frustration we've put together this batch of kinky, sexy, and self-deprecating memes. You're welcome.
If you're in the middle of a dry spell, you're also in luck. Twitter's new favorite meme is a self-deprecating look at the rollercoasters we experience when we're not getting any action. The tweets are witty, sad, and downright embarrassing all at once. So obviously, we're obsessed.
Okay look, everyone and their grandmother is on Tinder for one thing and one thing only, and honestly many of us are willing to do and say some...rather unholy things to get what we want. Let these Tinder convos be your inspiration before you slide into those DMs with your own horny (and/or cringey) pick-up lines!
This guy decided to out a girl he hooked up with after he found out she had herpes, after not disclosing it to him when they originally hooked up. Apparently he posted anonymously on their University's Facebook page, and just wanted to warn other people, because of his experience with her deceiving him. From there he proceeded to face quite a bit of backlash. Was he in fact the asshole for outing her, or did he do the right thing? Or, are they both just kind of crappy people in this equation?
He is over 100 years old, weighs about 175 pounds, is nearly 35 inches long, five feet tall, and the ladies love him. His name is Diego. Diego the Chelonoidis hoodensis Galapagos giant tortoise.
According to Washington Tapia, a tortoise preservation specialist at Galapagos National Park, Diego "has fathered an estimated 800 offspring, almost single-handedly rebuilding the species' population--and saving it from extinction--on their native island, Espanola, the southernmost in the Galapagos Archipelago."
"Around 50 years ago, there were only two males and 12 females of Diego's species alive on Espanola, and they were too spread out to reproduce."
Six years ago, they did a genetic study and discovered that Diego was the father of nearly 40 percent of the offspring released into the wild on Espanola, thereby doing more parenting than any other turtle to repopulate the species.
"He's a very sexually active male reproducer. He's contributed enormously to repopulating the island," said Tapia.
"Rawr, damn straight," replied Diego.
RAWR, those Olympic bodies!
Rio athletes have been allocated 450,000 condoms, and it seems they intend to use them all.
Tinder use has been up, with an increase in matches of 129% in the Olympic Village over the weekend.
But with bodies like these...
...all we can be is jealous.
Read the full AP article here.
That must have been a first for local law enforcement. A man called the police complaining about "loud panting" coming from under the entrance stairs of his house.
Turned out that a pair of hedgehogs had been mating there for about 20 minutes. If the man had not called, the fun would have gone on for hours.
BTW, no arrests were made...
Neil DeGrasse Tyson made a lot of people (and presumably ducks, cats and bedbugs) angry with a much less than true fact about sex and evolution. His claim, that sex doesn't hurt any species had many Twitter users jumping to correct him.
via @RachelFeltman, @SciPhile, @ClaireConnelly, @carlzimmer, @DreadMorgan
And you might be thinking, he's just trying to be positive about human sexuality and say, in his own pseudoscientific way that it's healthy and painless for humans. But... that's actually not true either:
via @DebbyHerbenick, @mikamckinnon
Sure, he's a scientist but cut him some slack, he's not that kind of scientist. He studied astrophysics, how's he supposed to check his facts at all before Tweeting about biology?