We feel like most of these are pretty spot on, what would other celebrities be like if they were in high school?
When you’re Shia LaBeouf, the provactive star of a bunch of movies with big fighting robots, you like to start beef.
Whether you’re wearing a bag on your head in the name of art or you’re ripping off a Daniel Clowes comic for your short film, if you’re Shia LaBeouf, you want to push buttons.
But some buttons should not be pushed, as the real Shia has recently learned.
According to Uproxx, “The rift between the two originates from a new freestyle by LaBeouf premiered on The Breakfast Club by Charlamagne Tha God. On the track, the Transformers star namechecks several different hip-hop figures ranging from Drake and Jean-Claude Van Damme to Lil Yachty and Peter Rosenberg, who LaBeouf rhymed with “frozen turd” in a stroke of genius.”
One person who did not find it to be a particular stroke of genius was Atlanta rapper Soulja Boy, who took to Instagram over the verse.
“Shia, you a b*tch *ss n****, you could never come to Atlanta, you could never come to the streets in the hood. You could never live my life, you need to stick to acting, real shit n****. This rap shit ain’t for you n****, for real have some n**** pull up on you, f*ck Shia LaBeouf n****, f*ck you talking about keep my name out your mouth, you don’t want no beef, on my mama. You better stick to acting n**** cause this sh*t get real.”
The message is clear, Shia: Stay out of Atlanta.
Mario Licato got punched in the face and knocked out for looking like Shia LaBeouf. No one knows what the motivation behind it was exactly, but according to Licato's Instagram post about his black eye, the last thing he heard before going down was, "this happened bc you look exactly like Shia LaBeouf".
The story isn't all bad, it seems like Licato is recovering quickly and he even got a voicemail from Shia LaBeouf himself. Licato told Cosmopolitan what the voicemail said and it's about what you might expect a rambling voicemail from Shia LaBeouf to sound like:
Hey, this is Shia LaBeouf … I just read an article that you were punched in the face because you look like me?" And he was like, "Aw, man. That sucks. I'm so sorry. But I get it. It's happened to me before." And then he was like, "I don't know. I wish I was in New York. I'd come bring you soup." He was just like, "This sucks. I don't even know what to say. I'm sorry. People are just crazy. Just because you look like me?" I was obviously laughing the whole time. And then he was like, "Here's my phone number. Don't give it to anybody. Please, please, call me back. Call me back if you want to. We could chat. Let's giggle over this. Maybe there's a silver lining in all this. But call me back." And then he was like, "And once again, this is Shia LaBeouf, the guy you got hit for looking like. And yeah, man, I'm sorry. I'm just really sorry." And he was like "Keep your head up, G." And that was it.
Shia LaBeouf is currently inside an elevator at Oxford University. Later, he has plans to give a talk at the university but he wanted to take some time for performance art. It would probably have been a pretty disappointing visit if he hadn't come up with something outrageous. Now people are lining up to ride the elevator with him.
If you're wondering what, exactly, is going on in there it sounds like mainly pictures and conversation.
Kudos to the young and seemingly continually controversial stud for his commitment to maintaining his sobriety; but dude, mega props for this sweats and socks-tucked-in combo. At least his lady lover friend Mia Goth (the two have been dating on and off since 2012) doesn't mind.
In other news, LaBeouf just won a lawsuit against his uncle, and will receive a $1 million dollar payout. It sounds like LaBeouf's uncle Barry Said is one lowballing, cheap son of a wayward son; and in short, never came through on paying Shia back for an $800,000 loan.
Seriously. Just pay him back!
10-year-old Amelia Poggenpoel reached out and touched Shia Labeouf's soul with the choirgirl pure voice of an angel.
Shia receives no shortage of grief, critical leers, and general public disapproval for his endless montage of hysterical press antics; and when the going gets rough, he gets tough, and dons a paper-bag.
The young Formby School of Dancing and Performing Arts student, Amelia Poggenpoel has her mother Tor to thank for her breakout vocalist performance. Tor told the ECHO: "I started talking about Amelia and how proud I am of her and how sometimes I don't feel that she's loved enough. I don't always have attention to give to her when I'm at work or if I'm tired. I got quite emotional talking about it and they then realized I was in the room with them. They took their headsets off and Shia started welling up. I told them that Amelia has an amazing voice, so he asked if she could sing for him."
The #TOUCHMYSOUL four-day live performance wrapped up a few days ago, after 2,000 people visited FACT in person to watch Shia take phone calls. Oh, also almost 300,000 people tuned in from a live webcam, so, that happened.
Fun fact: Shia Labeouf has been arrested five times.
Even more fun fact: He made a "terrific egg sandwich" during his last incarceration.
The actor and walking performance art piece gabs about his many run-ins with the law in Prison Ramen, a new book about celebrities and how being locked up has affected them.
Let's break down Shia's arrests from E! News:
That time he stole some Nike Cortezes.
"I have been incarcerated five times. The first time I was only nine years old. It was in Pacoima, California. I was arrested for stealing a pair of Nike Cortezes from a local shop and held for six hours," he writes.
That time he stole a Gameboy Pokémon.
"The second time I was eleven, in the city of Tujunga, California. I was arrested for stealing a Gameboy Pokémon from Kmart. That time, too, I was in a substation for about six hours," he continues.
That time he tried to stab his neighbor.
"The third time I was twenty, in Van Nuys, California. I tried to stab my neighbor and spent two days in jail. While I was there, I at least understood that being in jail is not the move," he admits. "It sucks ass."
That time he wouldn't leave Walgreen's and that time he disrupted a Broadway show.
"The fourth time I was in Chicago and I wouldn't leave Walgreen's, so I was taken to spend the night in jail. For some reason, I had the best sleep ever," he writes. "The most recent time was 2014, when I was twenty-eight and in New York City. I went to see the play Cabaret. I didn't behave very well during the performance and ended up spending twenty-five hours or so behind bars..."
Shia Labeouf: Rebel, Outlaw, The People's Criminal
Shia LaBeouf recently took to the red carpet for the premier of his most recent film "Nymphomaniac Volume I" with a bag on his head. Scribed on the face of the bag are the words"I AM NOT FAMOUS ANYMORE." Well, the internet has decided that this is somewhat true by continuing Shia's infamy with this Photoshop battle on Reddit.