We're so glad technology has come as far as it has. Waiting a day to download an album or a movie sounds like sheer torture.
If you've ever felt disconcerted by the way technology/AI have interfered in our lives, you're not alone. Twitter account @internetofshit is basically dedicated to waking people up to the fact that tech is ruining our lives in the most capitalistic ways possible. Let's all find new ways to do necessary life things and charge people a premium for it. What the heck is the world coming to?
In a WIN for every internet user, everywhere, Google has announced that they are going to rank sites that use pop-ups and interstitials further down the results page. They want to discourage behaviors where the content isn't "easily accessible."
The changes will go into effect next January, so in the meantime, try not to throw your computer out the window because of idiot new policies like Facebook's new one, forcing autoplay videos in its iOS and Android apps.
So, in the meantime, just follow the instructions above to keep your sanity.
Today is National Laziness Day, the most recent of made-up holidays and the internet can't get enough...
Yadda yadda yadda, laziness is supposedly a sign of intelligence... and my Editor wants more text here, but that's against the point of today, isn't it?
A major corporation runs a campaign to let people on the internet be a little creative with their brand and said campaign fails spectacularly because people are awful. Sound familiar? It's a tale as old as time. Or at least as old as Wifi. This time the social media screw up is burger themed, YUM!
This woman posted a photo gallery of her story on Imgur which led to a diagnosis of a genetic disease that affects connective tissues called Ehlers Danlos Syndrome (EDS). She explains the backstory in the description of the follow up picture post:
Five months ago, I posted "The Story Of A Broken Dancer." In this post, I told the story of how all I've ever wanted was to be a professional dancer, but that countless injuries and unexplained medical issues were coming in between me and my dream. Well, after posting this, hundreds of Imgurians commented on the post and messaged me saying I should look at different conditions or diseases they thought I had, but one that I received overwhelmingly was "Ehlers Danlos Syndrome (EDS), Hyper Mobility Type III." I looked into it and decided it was worth a shot to get the testing done, and as of this morning, I have been officially confirmed to have EDS.
You can look through her original gallery right here:
According to sources all over the internet, comedian Jon Lovitz got engaged to 27-year-old Jessica Lowndes over the Easter weekend. If you're not a fan of the TV show '90210', or moderately successful pop music then you might be asking... who?
If you saw the story you might have Googled her to find out after the serious love affair went viral. So then apparently the act, and this bizarre, pop-up video style music video were all worth it:
She's admitted the "early April Fools" joke on her Instagram so it looks like their "relationship" is over. Sorry, Jon Lovitz, time to go back to lurking in the shadows.
This woman went to work as a server and had President George W. Bush and his wife as customers. Apparently, they were pretty nice and left a "hella" tip. When she shared the picture they took together she referenced the conspiracy theory that "Bush did 9/11" as a joke.
At first it was funny, but she got more attention than she planned on getting.
The Tweet also got a lot of hate. Eventually it became necessary to let people know that she wasn't serious.
Come on, Internet, can't you guys take a joke?
While presumably celebrating his arrival in Bogotá, Columbia, Snoop Dogg took a selfie and checked in to Bogata, a city in Romania. This gave Bogata a lot of attention from the internet crowd. If you're wondering what kind of place it is, someone has already capitalized on the publicity by making visitbogata.com and explaining
Someone has already capitalized on the new publicity by making visitbogata.com to explain everything the place has to offer. Interestingly enough, in addition to being super chill, Bogata is a place where industrial hemp is grown so they couldn't have had a better accidental celebrity endorsement.
As for the people who actually live there, they don't really care. According to the Balkan Insight, one villager just seemed a little confused about the situation:
I don’t know how this singer – whoever is he – could make such a mistake. Bogota is one thing, Bogata something different Ioan, a 61-year-old villager said, according to a report in Pressone.ro magazine.
For whatever reason, the internet has just caught onto the fact that the fat child who ate an entire cake on Matilda hit puberty and came out the other end as a pretty good looking dude. You may not have been aware, but someone made the cast of Matilda get together and reenact favorite fan moments at a reunion for a bonus feature in a 2013 edition of the movie.
For those of you who have just discovered a new celebrity crush, here's the scene with him all grown up:
This "website" is really just a redirect to a Facebook search for friends who like Trump. If you're in the mood to shed some dead weight from your social obligations, this is the perfect tool.
Apparently this handy link originated from Gabriel Whaley, an internet troublemaker also known for the infinite text-in-progress gif.
In a recent interview with The Washington Post, George Lucas waxed poetic about the painful experience of letting go of Star Wars, and the lengths he's had to go to over the years in order to spare himself the vitriol of Star Wars fans. Apparently, "Lucas says he has assiduously avoided the Internet since 2000 — no Facebook, no Twitter, no e-mail even," which I guess means he's been lucky enough to never have to witness a debate about who shot first on someone's Facebook wall.
Speaking of who shot first, Lucas defended his "Greedo shot first" change as convincingly as you'll ever hear:
Han Solo was going to marry Leia, and you look back and say, ‘Should he be a cold-blooded killer?’ Because I was thinking mythologically — should he be a cowboy, should he be John Wayne? And I said, ‘Yeah, he should be John Wayne.’ And when you’re John Wayne, you don’t shoot people [first] — you let them have the first shot. It’s a mythological reality that we hope our society pays attention to.
Han Solo may be a stuck-up, half-witted, scruffy-looking nerf herder, but the man's got a code. Luckily for Lucas, he won't be online to read the responses to that argument.
Cleveland-based dentist Gino DiGiannantonio (aka Dr. Gino) may not know it yet, but his strange haircut has a lot of people talking.
His photo in an ad has been viewed over 3 million times the past 17 hours, because… that hair.
Here are just a few of the comments:
“When the hairdresser asks if the haircut looks good and you just say yes.”
“This man’s got a 3 head.”
“In his defense, he does have nice teeth and the sign is for dentistry.”
“looks more like a kitten covered in afterbirth to me”
He’s also starting to get the meme treatment:
“It’s not delivery, it’s DiGiannanitonianonio.”