This is it. We've reached peak "War on Christmas," and it isn't even December.
GOP presidential contender and deflated kickball Donald Trump is suggesting that people boycott Starbucks because of the recent controversy over their new snowflake-less Christmas coffee cups.
You see, this year Starbucks opted for a plain red coffee cup instead of a design that featured snowflakes and Christmas trees.
Some Christians are mad about this, and have started telling baristas that their name is "Merry Christmas" to force the employee to say it out loud.
Sensing some way to inject his personal brand of horrible into the conversation, Trump called for a boycott of the company at a recent rally.
"Did you read about Starbucks? No more Merry Christmas on Starbucks. No more. I wouldn't buy. Hey, look! I'm speaking against myself. I have one of the most successful Starbucks in Tump Tower. Maybe we should boycott Starbucks—I don't know."
Merry Christmas and happy election cycle!