Pokémon

For those unaware, Pokémon GO has all but taken over the planet at this point. Phone batteries everywhere have taken a devastating hit. People wander the streets with lifeless eyes, tired legs (still getting used to the whole walking everywhere thing) on the hunt for another Magikarp (cause you need like 500 of those to get a damn Gyarados).

Seriously. Go outside, look around, and catch at least a dozen folks committed to leveling up, catching 'em all, and hitting every f**king Poké Stop between here and Narnia, while on their way to a potentially perpetual state of unemployment. Like some of us really should be getting back to work at this point...

And now to the hot topic of the day: when you first start up with this game, you've the option to side with Team Instinct, Valor, or Mystic:





Well, an inspired piece of banner artwork from DeviantArt’s Seoxys6 is serving as the rallying point for players out there that have grown tired of the senseless hostility between players on different teams. Team Harmony's message goes:

“Disturb not the harmony of Fire, Ice, or Lightning lest these three Titans wreck destruction upon the world in which they clash. Though the water’s Great Guardian shall arise to quell the fighting alone its song will fail. Thus the Earth shall turn to ash. O, Chosen One, into thine hands bring together all three.”

Can this new, 'unofficial' team put an end to all the animosity, or nah? I appreciate the nod to the pokémon storyline -- in the movie Ash and friends have to do something with Lugia in order to restore order between the three legendary birds, Zapdos, Articuno, and Moltres.



I don't know though; these reactions suggest we might yet be on an endless quest to attain peace between competing factions....

Clearly what's going on here is our pony-tailed Pokemon trainer at hand is too low a level to tame the marshmallow-toned blubbery beast of a beluga.

Ever wake with a roaring hunger to explore? Well, your childhood dreams are about to come true. The team of big brains over at Niantic Labs released details regarding what will be a real life rendition on the typical Pokemon RPG game. With a smartphone and the game's wearable accessory you'll be able to hit the ground running to challenge gym leaders, friends, take on Team Rocket, and hopefully catch 'em all!

Pokémon products have really bottomed out.

With a stacked cast of 718 Pokémon in their Pokédex, it looks like the possibilities are endless. Especially for companies trying to make money on the back end and not take one on the cheek.

We're done.

But seriously, the official Japanese Pokémon Center store announced their newest line of products today and, simply, it highlights Pokémon butts.

It's called the Hip Pop Parade.



And it is a very extensive line. Butts on butts on butts.

There are keychains.



There are coin purses and tote bags.

There are decals and coffee mugs.



And so much more.

We're not sure we would sport these money makers, but we can't deny they are just a little bit cute.