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DJ Khaled is an author now.

His book, "The Keys" hits stores this November 22nd, and will be found near the "Success, Motivation & Self-Esteem" section on your local bookstore's shelves.

The hip-hop producer promises to provide such tips for success as "don't drive your jet ski in the dark."




His publisher is promising that the book will answer your pressing questions, like "[breaking] down the philosophy behind his trending catchphrases, including 'another one,' 'secure the bag,' 'special cloth alert,' 'bless up' and more."

The book description sounds more like Khaled is fleeing from an oppressive Scientology group than writing from a producer's perspective (who are the THEY he is afraid of?):



Buy a signed copy at a bargain price (shocker) here.

The good folks over at the New York Times wanted to show how "the nation's largest restaurant chains have made a big deal in recent years about introducing smaller portion sizes," but they have continued to make their dishes so rich they contain "a full day's worth of calories."




So they made a story showing what rought 2,000 calories looks like from some large restaurant chains, noting that "depending on age and gender, most adults should eat between 1,600 and 2,400 calories a day."



Are you guilty of eating a full day's calories in one sitting? What do you think of how little some of these dishes are for packing in so many calories? Let us know in the comments what you're thinking.

I, for one, forgot how delicious milk shakes are and may have to add that to my next meal out. Wrong lesson here?

Tired of standing in line at your favorite bakery or morning coffee shop?

Enter the Nissan ProPILOT Chair, which will move forward for you, keeping pace with the other chairs around it.





Using the same technology as the Nissan Pilot, the chair uses "autonomous tech for sitting in line." The chair "automatically moves the next person in line forward when appropriate. It removes the need to stand, even the need to pay attention, for the most part. When someone leaves the queue, the chair automatically moves itself to the back of the line for the next person to sit down."


So read your books, check Facebook, put on your makeup... anything but pay attention in line.




#FREEDOM

So GQ recently did an article showcasing Fall clothing as a backdrop to male climbers in Joshua Tree National Park:




Well, Outdoor Research didn't like how the women in the story were only portrayed as accessories to the climbers, frolicking in tiny bathing suits and adorning the men as stereotypes.





So they took it upon themselves to answer GQ's article, picture-by-picture using bad*ss women climbers:





Read the original GQ article here, and OutdoorResearch's awesome feminist response article here.

OutdoorResearch, you have one more fan right here.


#EverydaySexism

Gaten Matarazzo, who plays Dustin on "Stranger Things," went on the British talk show "The Jonathan Ross Show," to explain the disability he was born with: cleidocranial dysplasia.

Brave, well-spoken, and phenomenally open for a television broadcast, he is now even more of a treasure to watch and an excellent disability advocate.


Check out his interview below:

pic.twitter.com/Qmkpu3i7gQ

— Casey Daniels (@caseydanix) September 27, 2016

...and watch the highly anticipated second season of "Stranger Things" soon!

If you're a hipster L.A.-girl who likes to skateboard, then the new Snapchat video sunglasses called "Spectacles," are made just for you.





As Snap's (formerly Snapchat) first product, they take 10-second (up to 30 seconds) of hands-free video clips you can upload to your account. You can now take video as you do your normal, relatable, routine of skateboarding in an empty swimming pool, skateboarding down the beach sidewalk, or even skateboarding while holding hands in a chain with your hipster girlfriends!





For all your skateboarding Snapchat usages, they cost $130 and are being distributed to a select group to hype them at this time. Designed by tech heads, the reviews are mixed as people decide if they actually want to try this one out.





Check out the spec's--ahem--specs here, and tell us in the comments below if you'd buy these.

Is your weird Uncle Herbert spending too much time at Disney recently?

It may be because a urologist at Michigan State University recently "discovered that riding a roller coaster helps patients pass kidney stones with nearly a 70 percent success rate."





As it turns out, not every roller coaster is equal for stone passage, "Big Thunder Mountain was the only one that worked. We tried Space Mountain and Aerosmith's Rock 'n' Roller Coaster and both failed."

Read more about the discovery of fun, cheaper healthcare here.

It's Officially Fall people, so it's time to get your PSL Latte and eat your body weight in pumpkin noms! Here's a new dump cake recipe to try with your cans of pumpkin.

Well, okay, so maybe not exactly "real pumpkin" in those cans and actually squash, if it's tasty, I won't turn it down!



Let us know in the comments how tasty this bad boy is!

The creators of the Fidget Cube, Matthew and Mark McLachlan, have figured out the ONE niche that hadn't yet been met in society: fixing anxious people. The Fidget Cube Kickstarter project is meant to help put errant fingers to work--

Their initial goal was $15,000, but as of press time they had raised OVER $4.2 MILLION:




They describe the cube (which is basically just something to do with your fingers if you like to click pens/bite your fingernails/etc), as:





So let's all put our heads together and figure out the next way to take money from anxious people... ideas anyone?

It's nearly here!




The new Pokémon Go! Plus wearable is for sale Sept. 16th and though it's currently sold out on Amazon.com, you can keep an eye on it's availability here.


As for how it works,






At $35.99, the new wearable is cheaper than a new Apple watch and compatible with both Android and iOS devices. In the package, you should get both the device and an initial wrist strap, but you can also accessorize your Go Plus with Shield Skins and even a cool Power Bank to make your hunts longer.

Once it's released there should be a TON of third-party sites selling skins, alternative wrist straps, and accessories for it. From the looks of the pretty basic design, you can also probably pretty easily DIY your own wrist strap.





You can also just look super cool hanging it out of your shirt pocket--sans accessories--too:




So get out there and catch some Pokémon! Happy Hunting!

The durian fruit, known in southeast Asia as the "king of fruits," has a spiky exterior, soft fleshy insides, and it's flavor is described as "...a strange combination of savory, sweet, and creamy all at once... with subtle hints of chives mixed with powdered sugar. It's supposed to taste like diced garlic and caramel poured into whipped cream."



So the new condom with durian flavor is DEFINITELY a gamble, but maybe one that's worth it? At the very least, it's a lot of fun to watch the embarrassed Malaysians from 1:20 in the video above.

So it's a chance to take:

"Some people don't like the smell of durians, so during sex they might get turned off."



But if you're game, let us know in the comments if they worked well for you (or not).

A guy walked into a Subway restaurant and saw a worker using a bug zapper over the food bins to kill some gnats, so he freaked out, took a video, and alerted the health department.

The 55-second video of the incident was made by Justin Clemons at the Subway restaurant, on the way back from golfing with his young son. Clemons is also advertising the licensing of the video on Facebook.

Subway responded after Clemons got over 14,000 views on his Facebook page, which he really enjoyed:




Subway corporate gave the news their official statement for the news too:



They threw out all the food in the store and admonished the clerk, who, as far as we know now, didn't lose his job from all the bug killing.


The jury is out on whether the food bins were closed when the zapping occurred, but the news says the gnats came from spoiled fruit or a drain in the floor, both of which seems kind of gross.

In a super-touching image, a British Mom posted a back-to-school picture of her daughter Emily after losing her to childhood cancer in a super-effective effort to raise awareness of the disease.





She is encouraging everyone on Facebook to "Go Gold for Cancer Awareness" on your profile pic, like this:




Get all the links to show your support on Facebook and Twitter, and to learn more about the "Go Gold Project" here.

Uber has officially decided that the people of Pittsburgh are disposable, as they have started using self-driving cars to pick people up there as their first test location.




Pittsburgh is known for having dinosaur-sized potholes...








With Pittsburgh's confusing-to-navigate-roads, the cars (and passengers) def have their tests ahead of them.






The reviews are in, and folks aren't pleased, but technology always marches onward...






Hey, it could be worse I guess.

The European Space Agency (ESA) just released their satellite Gaia's "First Sky Map" showing our entire Milky Way Galaxy in one single image, the first of it's kind, from long-awaited space science technology.

According to Digg, "when Gaia completes its mission, humanity will have the most accurate and complete catalog of celestial bodies in the Milky Way."

American Girls. Those super-expensive dolls you could buy to look creepily exactly like you, look nothing like you, or to just be cute:


She's definitely cute


We can agree--whether with our parents over how much they cost, or at our friends for not letting us rip off their heads or cut off their hair--we have all had anger toward them at some point in our lives.

Enter Betches and their definitive ranking of the American Girls by Betchiness.

We get the glory of seeing that entitled historical b*tch Samantha, finally getting put in her place.

...and seeing Josefina Montoya--pronounced "HO-SEF-INA" (I know, because I used to work there and was REQUIRED to correct people who called in to order one, fun times)--put in her damn place brings me NO END of pleasure:




Plus with randos like Caroline Abbott...


...you will feel the satisfying burn of familiar hatred sparked within the childlike center of your soul.


Don't you just hate our faces?!


Check out more of the awesomeness and pick your favorite betch here.