Our Greatest National Threat of the Day: A 911 Call About Under-Cooked Waffles

Monkey Business of the Day: After Stealing a GoPro, This Monkey Can't Help But Enjoy a Selfie

Seth Rogan Gives an Opening Statement Before a Senate Hearing on Alzheimer's Research

Goodbye of the Day: Comedian Laurie Kilmartin Takes to Twitter to Deal With her Father's Declining Health in a Beautiful, Hilarious Way

Retro Future of the Day: This Might be the World's First Photographed Selfie

Presented Without Comment of the Day: Conservative Texan Dan Patrick Accidentally Endorses Gay Marriage in a Twitter Typo

Fruity Fun of the Day: Fete du Citron is the Celebration of Oranges You Didn't Even Know You Needed

This is Not "Free Willy" of the Day: You Should Definitely Avoid High-Fiving a Whale

Fad of the Day: Brooklyn Hipsters Are Feeding a New Facial Hair Transplant Craze

Windfall of the Day: A Couple Takes Their Dog for a Walk, Ends Up With $10 Million in Rare Coins

Jimmy Fallon and Paul Rudd Face Off in an Epic Lip Sync Battle

Russel Crowe Gets Really Clingy, Begs the Pope to See His New Movie

Science is Beautiful of the Day: Perfectly Preserved Aquatic Life Made Beautiful Through Embalming

Artsy Fartsy of the Day: Jun Kitagawa Wants to Unzip the World

Clever Analogy of the Day: How the Winter Storms in the US Are Exactly Like Justin Bieber

Shadow Play of the Day: Israeli PM Netanyahu Accidentally Gives Angela Merkel a Shadow Makeover